68. My Maine Birth : Sarah’s Five Hospital Birth Stories

Sarah: 0:00

far as, like my term, healthy, normal babies. Make sure you advocate for yourself. Make sure you have somebody that you fully trust, that you have somebody that's going to advocate for you, because with my firstborn I didn't have that. I didn't have someone explaining to me. You know, this is what we're doing, this is what has to happen, so your baby will be okay. They kind of just took over. You know, make sure that if you're not comfortable in a situation, you find out you know what's going on. Have your partner do it, somebody to explain to you because, especially as a first time mom, that's really scary. You want to be able to be involved in the process and, you know, have a say in what's going to happen. Like, obviously, if it's best for your baby, but you at least need to be explained what's going on. Make sure you just advocate for yourself.

Sarah: 0:45

And as far as like lost parents, just like we're Christians, so we kept the faith and we surrounded ourselves by people that you know had been through similar experiences, that had insight. You know we just kept hoping. You know maybe we'll have a fourth baby here earthside and it's really hard. And always make sure that you reach out to people and that you talk about your baby if you want and don't let anyone you know make you feel like you have to hide your baby away, because that was still your baby, that was still part of your family. You know Violet has a name, she has a face. We have some pictures of her that we do keep in the house like up on the wall with our other children, because she's our child.

Angela: 1:32

She might not be here, but she is. And yeah, I'm Angela and you're listening to my Maine Birth, a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated. Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you. Welcome to episode 68 of the my Main Birth podcast. Today's birth story guest is Sarah, and she shares her five main birth stories with us today. I do want to put a trigger warning on this episode, because she does talk about infant loss and, if you are currently pregnant, I want to encourage you to assess your emotional readiness for today's episode. All right, let's get into it. Hi, sarah, welcome to my Main Birth. Hi, so will you start by sharing a little bit about you and your family?

Sarah: 2:43

So will you start by sharing a little bit about you and your family. Yeah, I am 29. I got pregnant when I was 23. So our first baby was a surprise. My husband and I had only been married for like 10 months at the time and I was going to college full time and he was trying to get a trucking degree, and so it was like um college. The only babies we had tried to have, up till the point of all of my kids, were out of my five kids. The only babies we tried to have were two of them. So they're all like surprise babies and we have had all of our kids within four years. Wow, oh, my goodness. We've been really. It's been nonstop, since like we've been married seven years. So we've been. It's been crazy. All boys Violet was the only girl. Yeah, four boys and one girl. It's been a lot.

Angela: 3:40

So tell me about when you found out you were pregnant for the first time and your thoughts in choosing your care.

Sarah: 3:46

When I was pregnant the first time, he was completely unexpected. I had no idea I was pregnant until like a month in. So I was like I had, obviously, at 22, 23,. You know, going to college, and you're like, oh great, what am I supposed to do? You know, going to college, and you're like, oh great, what am I supposed to do? And so, um, I didn't really have a lot of like. I went to college for obviously, like dealing with kids, like being a teacher, and so I was like, oh, you know, I've got this, but it's really different when you're actually like going to become a mother. And so, yeah, I uh talked to my some of my friends and they were like, oh, you know, I had a midwife and you're young, you won't have any problems. So we gave birth for my firstborn because we hadn't moved down to, um, the Western Maine area.

Sarah: 4:33

I was in Bangor, um, eastern Maine, and he was born there and I had it wasn't like a constant doctor. I saw a bunch of different providers, which was hard, because it would have been a lot easier, I think, if I had one specific provider instead of you know what I mean Seeing a bunch of different doctors, and it wasn't like super consistent and like they were, they were decent. I, comparing that to my last three births with my midwife, it was I recommend a midwife like if you can do it like a lot, yeah, go that route, cause it's they're not as like pushy, I guess, and um, they kind of, because I have a lady at Northern Life in Portland. She's wonderful, she's very um the the difference between her and my last, my firstborn when my last three kids, she's great, how did that pregnancy sort of look for you?

Angela: 5:21

how are you feeling and were you um not doing any testing?

Sarah: 5:26

nope, I did like a lot of like the standard tests, like I did like the gestational diabetes test. They did the. You know, I ended up, towards the end, I had, um, I think it was about 34 weeks and my blood pressure started spiking and they obviously wanted to test for preeclampsia and so I went and, uh, they did like I did. I had a bunch of blood done. I did that urine test. Really that 24-hour urine test was a lot of fun, um, but um, no, I didn't have it, thank goodness, and it progressed normally to. I got to go to term. He was born at 40 weeks, so he was term and I gave birth from start to finish because I was induced. I had cervidil and my water broke and I had him in two and a half hours total, no epidural. Yeah, it was rough.

Sarah: 6:22

It was rough, but the pregnancy was pretty cut and dry, up until the point of you know my blood pressure. That was pretty decent, it wasn't bad. So was that why they wanted to induce you? Yeah, I would have you know, obviously, if I had had my choice gone naturally, because I've gone naturally with only one of my kids and out of all my births, that was the best.

Sarah: 6:42

Wow, yeah, he was my hardest baby. He was, he had reflux, he, he did not sleep, he wouldn't nap. He had a very hard time in the beginning and, honestly, when I first, you know, had him, it was as a first time mom and your first baby's that difficult, like not sleeping, crying all the time. You're like what the heck have I got myself into? And, like I said, as a child care provider, I thought I'd be ready. I was not ready. It was a lot because, especially like I got mastitis a lot in the beginning, I think I had it like three times within a month I was on medication and I wasn't sleeping and he was on medication for reflux. So you have, you know, that hard of a time in the beginning it's. It can be depressing, but we did well and he, about six months. It evened out and it was great. You know I was. It was so exciting to be a mom. I loved it having your own baby and so exciting, it was wonderful for the first time.

Sarah: 7:43

And then, um, yeah, I didn't think we wanted any more kids after the first one because, like I said, it was really rough. And then, all of a sudden, you know, boom, boom, boom, we have the rest of them in like three years. But it was, you know, they're like potato chips. You just you have one and you want like six of them. Well, well, maybe not everyone, but I love kids, I love it.

Angela: 8:07

So now, yeah, tell me about when you found out you're pregnant for the second time now and like your thoughts and choosing your care this time around.

Sarah: 8:14

Yep, so by that point we were down here in Western Maine area. I know we were in Lewiston, we were towards Auburn, that area, and we had an age gap I think, of like 15 months I started, so they're about two. They're exactly two years apart. Their birthdays are three days of each other, I think. Yeah. So you know, it was a little bit different because, like I said, in the beginning it was really rough because he was not an easy baby and so it kind of tainted the experience, I think, at first. But you know, we wanted our kids closer in age because I don't like that really big age gap where they don't, you know, have someone to play with. And I mean, I come from a family with four siblings, so I didn't think it was realistic to not, you know, want more kids and so it's fun to have a big family, and so we're like okay, you know.

Sarah: 9:07

But you know he was the one of the only babies we planned on having, my second um, and so we got pregnant. I think we started trying November and I got pregnant in December, so the first month, and so, um, we went to a different hospital down here, I went to St Mary's before they closed and it was in 2020 that I gave birth, so my care was he was born in August, so it was during the pandemic, which was crazy, you know, like the second time mom, oh, pandemic, that's awesome and just like. It was just crazy. And all my babies have been COVID babies, so it's just been you know the hospital care, even versus when I had my firstborn. You know the masking and the temperature checks and that obviously adds like stress to your you know experience and stuff, and so it was harder with him because there was a lot more going on in the world then.

Sarah: 9:58

But he was healthy when, you know, he was born and I didn't have any complications until the end, when I had high blood pressure, I think at 38 weeks, 39 weeks, like right at the end, and so had to be induced again, which was not fun. Um, and so he was born. He was about nine pounds and I had a little bit of medication with him, like just in an IV, and didn't work very well because he was born in five hours. My labor was five hours with him, but he was a very easy baby. He, you know, he slept, he didn't have reflux, and so it was like a really stark contrast from the firstborn and I was like, wow, you know, this is kind of enjoyable, I'm not having mastitis all the time. He nursed really well, it was great, and the midwife experience was she's wonderful. She's, like I said, birthed three of my babies.

Sarah: 10:54

I love her to death and it was like a lot more relaxed and I felt like a lot more listened to than I did in the first experience because it was really rushed and you you know, because I had a baby in two hours and so, yeah, he was great and it was easy as far as him being a baby. The labor wasn't super pleasant because, you know five hours. I think that was easier than the first one. Yeah, five hours is still definitely pretty. Yeah, oh yeah my, my, yeah, the last baby I've had, my fifth baby, was one hour. So, oh, my goodness, I'm not kidding, natural.

Angela: 11:35

So tell me about when you found out. You were pregnant for the third time now, so all the rest of your pregnancies were at St Mary's, so you went with the same care again.

Sarah: 11:44

Yep, she, my last baby, was born in 2021. He was born the year before they closed the birthing center down, which was sad because that was a wonderful team there that they had going. I mean, I had really good experiences there. He was born during the end of the pandemic but, like when you, when we first got pregnant with him, he was a complete surprise and he was actually a miracle, honestly, because he had a I can't pronounce the word a circumvallate placenta, when the placenta is folded in on itself, kind of, and he ended up measuring in the early stages I think three weeks behind of what he was supposed to be as far as based on, you know, when they would have calculated he was conceived. So he actually ended up being complete surprise.

Sarah: 12:34

I didn't know even like I had been pregnant until I had been nursing my second and I like stopped making milk. I was like what the heck? Because I've always overproduced really badly. I was like what the heck? And I was like, and and my mom's like, well, you should take a pregnancy test because you know I'd stopped making milk when I was pregnant. And I was like, oh, no, cause I had only been like five months postpartum. And so I took pregnancy test and, sure enough, it was like two really bright lines and I was like, oh my gosh, these babies only could be like 13 or 14 months apart. And so, yeah, he ended up being.

Sarah: 13:11

He had a placental abruption when he was being born. I think it was like on the core of his placenta and I had him. He was the only one that I went into labor naturally with. We had been moving at the time, so like throughout the end of my pregnancy. He was born in November of 21.

Sarah: 13:27

So, like from September to like right up till he was born, we're moving and like fixing houses and all of the craziness. And so he just decided, oh, I've had enough of this, I'm coming out. And so I my water didn't break, it broke the hospital, but, like I knew it, I was in labor. I got to the hospital and I was seven so, but seven centimeters dilated and, yeah, I like a really high pain tolerance apparently. And so I was in labor for like three hours. He came out. I think he was born in like about five total four or five, and so, yeah, he was our little miracle because he was not supposed to, you know, obviously have no complications like he did. I know there's like a bigger statistical increase of like miscarriage and stuff like that when they have the placenta issue, so that's pretty scary and then the placental abruption.

Angela: 14:17

But he's here and he's really healthy and doing wonderfully and he's a little blessing and he's great wonderfully and he's a little blessing and he's great, yeah, yeah, so would you be willing to share just a little bit more about his birth experience and about how that unfolded with the placenta issue? Like during your birth experience, how did that um sort of go after water broke at the hospital?

Sarah: 14:39

yeah, um, we didn't know until he was born that he had abrupted or because I think it was so. But also when they have that issue, I'm sure you know, like it also increases the risk of abruption when it's like that. So they don't really know how long he was abrupted. He was a lot. I've had, you know, a lot of. I've had four babies, turn babies, and they were all about nine pounds and he was a pound less than the rest of them. So I think, you know, in the beginning might've hindered his nutrient absorption. I don't know, we, we don't really know.

Sarah: 15:11

But, like I said, that was also during a pandemic. I didn't get and it wasn't like obviously the hospital's fault. I, uh, my husband was working a lot in the beginning and so it was really hard to like get some prenatal care as far as like a lot of video visits and phone calls, because we were, you know it was the pandemic, things were a lot different, and so I think that had I, you know, probably been able to get more stuff done and not been so, you know, in fear of going to the office and stuff like that, it probably would have been, I don't know if I'd been caught. I went to, you know, the ultrasounds. I never saw anything, but he was fine. I mean, he was born really quickly and the least painful of any of my kids, and it was. He was fine.

Sarah: 16:00

She's like she. Just she's like, oh wait, that's circumvalent. I was like, what do you mean? And she's like, and she was like, you want to look at it? I was like, no, it's gross, not really in the mood for that. But, um, yeah, so he survived the placental abruption and that was my midwife that I've had for the last three babies and and she's, I really trust her. She's very, especially after this last one, my fifth little boy, fifth child. There he was, uh, yeah, she's been wonderful. Like I said, midwife is definitely the way to go, if you can, yeah so now you're a fourth sweet baby.

Angela: 16:46

Will you share when you found out you're pregnant for the fourth time?

Sarah: 16:49

yeah, she um was also a surprise. I had not had a period yet and so I was like I don't know, I don't really remember what prompted me to, you know, try to take a pregnancy test. Because I was like I don't know, I don't really remember what prompted me to try to take a pregnancy test because I was only three months postpartum Three months, I mean, I was still making milk. I didn't have any real indications, but I was like, oh you know, just for science, and so I took it and it was really positive, like so I don't even you know, she was measuring literally like three months after her brother they were going to be Irish twins and so that experience was a lot different as far as during her pregnancy, because I had been pregnant with three boys, so I don't know like a lot of difference between the girls and the boys, like and some people can say, oh, you know, they move more, they. I had heartburn. The only thing that was ever different with her was like her heart rate was faster than my son's and it was, you know, I went, I think I was 14 weeks when I got my first ultrasound, so she was measuring right on track, but she so we're, you know, smooth sailing up to 14 weeks and then a little bit passes. I was supposed to have like a 20-week scan. I did go to the you know, st Mary's closed that year, in 2022. So I had still been going to St Mary's with my lovely midwife, so she, you know, was looking good up until I started I think it was July 5th of 2022 I woke up and I was bleeding a lot and, um, at this point we didn't know the gender, we hadn't had her anatomy scan, um, so I woke up and I was bleeding a lot and, uh, we ended up calling my mom and she came.

Sarah: 18:35

You know, she only was 10 minutes from here. So she came and she sat with the boys. It was like three in the morning, so it was like we had to go to uh Stephen's Memorial over there. It's like five minutes from here, lewiston's like 40 minutes, so it would have been too long and, um, something I just, you know we prayed for the baby. I just kind of was like I obviously had three healthy pregnancies.

Sarah: 18:56

I had no idea what was going on. Everything had been fine. She never moved at all during the pregnancy. I think I remember her moving once and by that point she was almost 21 weeks old and I had felt my little boys when they were like 14 weeks, so that was the only indication that something was wrong. But we still had no idea. And so I go in and she, uh, was born, I think within the hour, about four, so about an hour.

Sarah: 19:29

And uh, the doctor that there obviously didn't have like a history on me because that wasn't my main provider and, um, she was nice. You know, it was a sad time because she was born, um, not, she was, she had passed by the time she was born and, um, that was, we found out she was a girl, her first girl when she was born. And that was incredibly sad because I had been wanting a girl and, if you know that had been the case, we probably wouldn't have had any more kids because we've had three boys and the girls, so my, my littlest guy wouldn't even be here. But, um, it was hard. Um, they think it was a complete placental eruption that caused her to pass.

Sarah: 20:15

And uh, yeah, that was hard on my whole family and I had a lot of supportive friends that came out of the woodwork and shared their stories with me and they're like, I didn't realize, like you don't think about it until it happens to you, you don't. You don't put, you know, two and two together. Oh well, you know, I think it's those statistics like one and three for like miscarriage, stillbirth honestly I'm not sure, like stillbirth, but I know at that point when you're in 20 weeks you're like, oh, I'm in the clear, I've had three other babies, and then it hits you like a rock and it's hard and I got a lot of support from people that I really didn't, you know, was friends with them on Facebook but I wasn't like super personally close to them and they really became some supportive people to me. My mother was very supportive, my sisters, you know, and it's like it's sad when stuff like that happens. But you know, you cling to like your faith and you cling to your friends and your family and I really got some encouragement from people that shared their stories and it was hard but I kept having faith. You know I was supposed to be a mom. I always, you know, wanted a big family.

Sarah: 21:29

It was hard for my husband as well, because his mother passed a week after our daughter did yeah, so we had two losses that year and so that wasn't a fun year at all. It was really hard. And you know you kind of feel like it's your fault because you know what could I have done differently? What did I? What did I eat? What did I take? Did I do something too rough? Did I walk too much? You know's just like, just it's crazy. And you know the doctor's always like, oh, it's not your fault, but you can't really help, but feel like it is because it's your body and it's your daughter that passed away and no one really gets it unless it's happened to them.

Sarah: 22:13

And I'm glad I had that team reach out and my midwife was very supportive. You know she's trying to get me to go to a walk for like a memorial walk for babies and stuff like that and she was always in touch with me and touching base and she was very supportive and it's nice to have the same woman there that knows you from prior experience and you know to keep track and tabs of you. As far as how you're doing to see the same provider, that was the issue I had with my first son as how you're doing to see the same provider that was the issue I had with my first son was I didn't get to see the same provider, but it helps when they know you and have a relationship with you. So that was rough but we got through it and we got pregnant again at the end of 2022 with my fifth baby, fourth boy. So it's been crazy, sad and happy and, yeah, it's been a lot.

Sarah: 23:07

I'm appreciative of people sharing their stories and the fact that I had my faith and my family and friends that reached out and obviously my children kept me busy like that helped a lot. And my third son he also had had a placental abruption, like I said earlier, and so you know like you're like, oh my gosh, you know he could have died and blah, blah, and it makes you just so more much more grateful for what you do have, because it could have been the same with him and it's just. I don't even like thinking about it. But he was only eight months when she was born, so it was nice to be able to come home to a baby and still have you know, someone that needs you. I feel terrible for mothers that leave the hospital without you know a baby at home, because it's just hard. I don't wish this on anyone, but yeah, it was not fun. But yeah, it was not fun. Well, thank you for sharing.

Angela: 24:00

Yeah, so you said. At the end of that year you found out you were pregnant again. Do you want to share about what?

Sarah: 24:07

that was like, yes, so we had been, you know, not preventing to get pregnant because you know after you lose a baby, it's not trying to replace the baby, it's just when you lose one of your children. It's like at that point you don't In my personal experience you don't care to prevent anymore, honestly, because you want to add your family. You suffered a major loss. I know that some people probably might not want to get pregnant right off after a loss and I think it was about six, five or six months in when he so it was about December we found out we were pregnant with him and it was right around Christmas and I did a little reveal for my family, because only my sister knew that morning I, uh, we had been trying to get pregnant and so we had no idea when it happened, but we hadn't been preventing anything. And so we all sat down in the living room and it was Christmas time and I bought my husband a little bag and I put the pregnancy test in it and I put a baby doll in it and he pulls it out and he's like what the heck? And he was just like looking at everything and I was like Merry Christmas, he's like what the heck? And he was just like looking at everything and I was like Merry Christmas.

Sarah: 25:25

He's like wait, what I was like we're gonna have a baby and so like it was like my mom was really excited and everyone was like excited obviously after you, you know, was a baby and then you have another to add to the family. It's like it helps like the joy come back a little more, as far as everyone's not like I don't know, just mourning, you can kind of rejoice a little more. It brings a little more peace. But then you know, obviously after you lose a baby, you're like, oh great, now what? Because there's, that was the scariest pregnancy I had. Because after losing, like my mid midwife said, after you lose a baby, it's like you just take it one day at a time, because today I'm pregnant, today I'm pregnant, you know, it's like, and I kept having faith and I prayed for the baby and we all prayed for the baby and he was perfectly healthy and um yeah, so how was that pregnancy?

Angela: 26:19

did it, did you um do testing, or were you feeling good throughout that pregnancy, or is that?

Sarah: 26:26

I, mentally I was very stressed obviously, um, I felt great I got, I was sick in a little bit, but, um, I wasn't sick at all with my daughter. So I was like, oh good, I'm sick, that's a good sign, right. Um, I did end up having in my daughter. So I was like, oh good, I'm sick, that's a good sign, right? I did end up having. In the beginning, I think it was like nine weeks or 10 weeks I had a slightly it wasn't too big, but had a subchorionic like a hematoma and obviously like that scared me a little bit. I wanted to do, I wanted to wait till birth to find out what he was so like, I obviously like, was fearful of like any little twinge or whatever. So I ended up I did go to the ER like 14 weeks just to be like, hey, can you check? Had an ultrasound done and he was a boy.

Sarah: 27:08

After you know like that many ultrasounds I can tell. And she's like, oh, you didn't want to know. And she's like, she's like look, look, look. And I was like, oh, no, no, I was, you know, gonna be team green, I didn't want to know. And she's like, oh, I'm sorry, you know. I was like, oh, that's okay. Is he healthy though? But he was in great shape and throughout the whole pregnancy he was wonderful. Everything was great.

Sarah: 27:33

We went. We ended up going because, like you said, st Mary's had closed at the time. At, you know, it's closed down now. We went to Northern Light Mercy in Portland and um it it. I had the best experience there I have given birth all over the state and I didn't meet one person that I was like my midwife had actually gone there after St Mary's closed. Yeah, and um she's. You know everyone there's really kind and you know they understood.

Sarah: 28:02

After you know, losing a baby, you know I was very paranoid and so they always tried to reassure me. You know, everything looks good. Everything looks good. You know, do you have any questions? And I always like I didn't really have any questions but I would be like, you know, do you think this is normal? Or you think this is normal? Like because you feel like after you know that be my fifth pregnancy, you don't really have questions, but then you do after a loss, it's like really hard. You feel like, oh, I've got lots of experience, but then I don't have any experience being a lost mother, so it's harder, but everyone was really kind, it was great.

Angela: 28:40

Yeah, that's amazing that your midwife is over there now so you're still able, even though birthing somewhere else. Yeah, that's so sad that birthing center closed, but you're still able to go with her, so that's cool. She's great lover. Do you care to share her name, uh?

Sarah: 28:51

she's caitlin sloan. I've had her. You know all my kids except my first. Basically I love her to death. She is, you know she is. I haven't had great experiences growing up, like with doctors and like in the beginning when my first born, like I said, it was really rushed. No one listened to me. I was a first-time mom. No one explained anything. She's never been anything but kind and down-to-earth, which I love. She's very down-to-earth, she's not judgmental. Um, I love her very much and she's been through a lot with me, like loss, rainbow babies, you know, fast labors, like postpartum anxiety, certain things, and she's been great and I owe her a lot for as far as, like, my mental health, as far as after having a loss, it's she's mental health. As far as after having a loss, it's she's. She was very reassuring and she's been very helpful and it was great and yeah, yeah.

Angela: 29:46

So now tell me about like the last few weeks of your pregnancy, then with him, and like leading up to your labor and birth yeah, so he had been measuring very large he was.

Sarah: 30:00

I went to my 32 week scan and he was five pounds. Oh yeah, he was my biggest baby at that point and she's like she has total confidence, caitlin, and me. She's like you can, you know you can birth big babies. You've done this before. You know, I've had, you've had eight, nine pound babies, blah, blah, blah. So I was like, oh great, okay, if you say so, and then it's going well. And I really wanted to give birth naturally again because my third born son was, like I said, my only natural, normal labor and it was great, honestly, and I wanted to do it again.

Sarah: 30:37

And of course, my blood pressure spiked in the end of my pregnancy. Again, it always does. I never get preeclampsia, but it always spikes. And so she's like you know he's. I think at that point they were guessing he was about nine pounds and so she's a day the day before was it a couple of days before it had been a Friday, and that was my, my, like I think, my 38 week appointment and she feels him and he's head down, he's good position. Blah, blah, blah. She's like you know, I wasn't super ready to go, but after that, you know, like five, four babies you're gonna be, it won't be long, it's not hard for your body to get to that point and so, um, she's, like, you know, you can be induced and I, you know, recommend because after loss, you know, that was another thing we were nervous about. You know, who don't want to risk anything.

Sarah: 31:28

And so we went home and I said goodbye to my kids and we had to drive back to Portland and then, on the way down, at 38 weeks and four days, he flipped, breach and we get to the hospital. I felt him flip, but I didn't know that it was a movement, but it wasn't super exaggerated because, like I said, he's almost nine pounds Full term. He flipped and so I get and and she goes, she goes. Wait, he was head down two days ago. I was like wait, what do you mean? Like, yeah, he flipped. I was like no, because I obviously, like I've done some research where they give you like the eve, what is it? Evc? They take the baby, you know, and they put them around, yeah, and she's like, well, we can try this, which I'm very confident will work, because, like I said, she's always reassuring me, because you know she doesn't want to stress me out and she knows how I am and she's um, she's like and she's like.

Sarah: 32:32

But you know, I have to tell you that we'd have to probably do a C-section if you know baby was in trouble or you know it wasn't working. And so we're all praying my husband's just there praying because we have three little kids at home we're all just praying God, please, I can't have a C-section right now. And so it took, I think, three tries and then on the third try they flipped him around and, yeah, that was the EVC was not fun, that was. I mean, I've had all natural labors along my kids and that was really painful. It worked and I would you know, if that will spare you from the C-section, definitely go for it. But it was like not fun.

Sarah: 33:11

And so he was born. He did not score very well in his APGAR. I hadn't his. You know when they do the score when the baby's first born. I think he had a two out of like eight or nine. He was there, he wasn't breathing.

Sarah: 33:26

They had to like resuscitate him and I freaked out a little, obviously, and my husband freaked out, but Caitlin like, she's like, he'll be all right, he's okay.

Sarah: 33:35

He's okay, he's just stunned, he's all right, because, after my daughter, we're thinking the worst, because he's not crying, he's not breathing, he's not moving and he's got the cord around his neck. But they take that off and then they resuscitate him and all of a sudden I hear a loud scream and he's doing well and um, yeah, and so I was really grateful to her in that moment because it was like she's, she gave me the confidence to be like you know, he's okay, he's not gonna pass away, he's not gonna. You know, there's nothing wrong, I know. So they had to test his port gases. Yeah, just gave him a minute and, um, he, he was great on you know, the five minute test and they had tested his core gases just to make sure he was OK and he's perfectly fine. And we got to go home a day later and it was great and yeah, so it was. It was dramatic, but he's here and he's.

Angela: 34:30

Oh my God. You said that was only an hour long. I think, yeah, right. So how? So right after they flipped him around, they were like, ok, right. Oh my god, because you said that was only an hour long. I think, yeah, right, so how did that? So, right after they flipped him around, they were like, okay, right into production, right? So then it was just right.

Sarah: 34:40

after that he was like okay, I'm here, yeah, he, yeah, yeah, he was. He. His head didn't have any time to like really like how their heads come out kind of elongated. He had a perfectly round head and he like, he basically like just shot out, basically, and that's why he was like under such distress when he was born, because he didn't have a chance to do anything. He just basically was like here I am, and it was good, because, you know, I'd rather have fast labors. My mom, I was. I was almost 12 pounds when I was born. I was a C-section baby. My mom was in labor with me for like three days. So yeah, I would much rather have quick labors, I think.

Angela: 35:22

Wow, oh, my goodness.

Sarah: 35:24

Crazy.

Angela: 35:26

So now it's a final question. Let me ask you if you were to give advice to expecting parents, or even new parents, what would be kind of the biggest thing that you would want to say?

Sarah: 35:37

um, as far as, like my term, healthy, normal babies, um, make sure you advocate for yourself. Make sure you have somebody that you fully trust, that you have somebody that's going to advocate for you, because with my firstborn I didn't have that. I didn't have someone explaining to me you. You know this is what we're doing, this is what has to happen, so your baby will be okay. They kind of just took over, you know. Make sure that if you're not comfortable in a situation, you find out, you know what's going on, have your partner do it, somebody to explain to you because, especially as a first time mom, that's really scary. You want to be able to be involved in the process and, you know, have a say in what's going to happen. Like, obviously, if it's best for your baby, but you at least need to be explained what's going on. Make sure you just advocate for yourself.

Sarah: 36:23

And as far as, like, lost parents, just like we're Christians, so we kept the faith and we surrounded ourselves by people that had been through similar experiences, that had insight. You know we we just kept hoping. You know, maybe we'll have a fourth baby here or side and it's really hard, and always make sure that you reach out to people and that you talk about your baby if you want, and don't let anyone make you feel like you have to hide your baby away, because that was still your baby, that was still part of your family. You knowet has a name. She has a face. We have some pictures of her that we do keep in the house like up on the wall with our other children, because she's our child.

Angela: 37:04

She might not be here but she is and um yeah, yeah, well, thank you so much, sarah, for sharing all of those stories with us of.

Sarah: 37:14

I love to be able to help others, because this is not something easy to go through and you always want to make sure that you are capable of sharing your story, because it probably will help someone else. I know it did help me, so yeah.

Angela: 37:29

And that's the end of another episode of the my Main Birth podcast. Thank you for joining me and listening. If you're looking to document your birth story or if you're interested in doula support for your upcoming birth, head over to my website, mymainbirthcom and check out my packages. I am a certified professional birth photographer and an experienced doula, and I offer in-person services to families throughout the state of Maine, as well as virtual birth coaching worldwide. I want to invite you to grab my top free resource for newly pregnant moms. It's called 37 Questions to Ask your Care Provider, Whether you've already established care or if you're in the process of interviewing new providers. This is for you. Not only are you going to get the questions to ask, but I also share how to assess their answers and the major red flags that you should be looking for. So go grab that. It's at mymainbirthcom slash download. Thank you again for tuning in and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories. Don't forget to subscribe and leave me a review, and I'll see you back here again next week.