MyMaine Birth, Rachel Hollinger a Postpartum Doula in Belfast, Maine shares her two birth stories

Today’s birth story guest is Rachel Hollinger, a postpartum doula and chef based out of the Belfast, Maine area. She shares her two birth stories with us today and the importance of being held in the postpartum period. You can connect with her on her website at www.nourisherdoula.com or on instagram @nourisherdoula

MyMaine Birth is a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine.  From our state's biggest hospitals to Birth Center Births, and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated.  From the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn, we explore the journey of childbirth in all of it's beauty, intensity, and emotion.

Whether you are a soon to be mom, a seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you!

Thanks for listening, and don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review!

Childbirth is a momentous event, often marked by a mix of intense emotions, challenges, and profound transformations. This blog post delves into the many facets of motherhood, from the raw and beautiful experiences of childbirth to the significance of postpartum care. In a recent podcast episode, we uncovered the deeply personal stories of several mothers, each narrating their unique journey through pregnancy, birth, and the critical fourth trimester.

One narrative, in particular, stands out as it unfolds against the dramatic backdrop of a Colorado blizzard. The storyteller recounts the serene act of making pie dough before labor strikes, symbolizing the calm before the storm. This story isn't unique in its challenges; many mothers face unexpected turns during childbirth. From cars stuck in snow to laboring without the desired support, the episode paints a vivid picture of the unpredictability of birth and the resilience required to navigate it.

But birth is only the beginning. The postpartum period brings its own set of trials, often under-discussed and under-supported. In the episode, Rachel Hollinger, a postpartum doula and chef, shares her experiences, providing insight into the transformative power of proper postnatal care. Rachel's own battle with Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG), a severe form of morning sickness, exemplifies the unpredictable nature of pregnancy and the need for individualized care and support.

Another poignant part of the conversation centers on the often unspoken difficulties of breastfeeding and the potential for postpartum depression. These experiences highlight the critical need for a supportive network and resources for new mothers. The discussion is candid and revealing, providing a sense of solidarity and understanding for those who have encountered similar challenges.

The episode doesn't shy away from the harsh realities some face during childbirth, including traumatic experiences and the struggle to connect with their newborn. Through these stories, the podcast underscores the importance of self-advocacy and the right to informed, compassionate care during one of life's most vulnerable times.

As the episode progresses, the importance of capturing and honoring these birth stories becomes clear. Whether through photography or shared narratives, preserving the memory of childbirth is an act of celebration and healing. It's a way to hold onto the fleeting moments that define the transformation into motherhood.

This podcast episode serves as a reminder of the courage, love, and resilience inherent in the birth experience. It is a tribute to the power of mother-centric care and the value of being mothered as one becomes a new mother. Whether you are reminiscing about your own birth story or preparing for the chapter of parenthood, these narratives offer a glimpse into the courage, love, and resilience that define the birth experience.

Full Transcript:

Rachel: 0:00

We were watching a movie after my daughter was in bed and I started having contractions during the movie and then kind of just like curled up in our bed and tried to like rest in between, for I think it was probably about four or five hours, and then they started to get a little bit more intense. A little bit more intense. So I let my midwife know and my doula and my friend, and they were all kind of like, okay, we'll start heading that way, cause they none of them lived super close to us, so they were all kind of packing up and right around that time is like the thunderstorm had really hit and my daughter woke up because of it and came into our room this was probably like 2 AM or something like that and I was like the baby's coming and it was like this is really like sweet middle of the night, excited, energy, and we were like let's go sit on the porch and like watch the storm. So we all like put sweaters and blankets and stuff and we went on this was in May, so it was still a little chilly and, um, we all went and sat on the back porch and like watched the storm hit and just kind of like sat in a pile together and I was still having contractions. So I kind of like paced the porch now and then and we took a picture which is still my favorite picture, even though I had like really beautiful birth pictures. It's my favorite one and it's all blurry and dark and it's like the three of us are just like cheesing on the back porch in the middle of the night.

Rachel: 1:34

It was so special to have my daughter share that with me and also see that I was like everything. I was happy and I was scared and I was excited and I was grieving because she was, you know, like making this transition with me from being the only to being a sibling and yeah, it was just. It was a really beautiful moment for us. And then she went back to sleep, which is like so wild Cause I at the at that point I was like well, we're really screwed.

Rachel: 2:06

Like now our daughter's like up at 2 AM and I'm not even close to having this baby. But yeah, she went back to sleep and my team got there, everybody got there, and my friend kind of like made me something warm to drink and I just kept laboring and when the sun came up early in the morning I said I really, really want to be outside. So I labored in our back garden with the chickens kind of pecking around, and Bea was up at that point. My daughter's name is Bea Beatrice point. My daughter's name is B Beatrice and she was kind of running around and playing in her playhouse and like playing with the chickens and I was just kind of laboring. It was so beautiful. I was just in my nightgown walking around.

Angela: 2:58

I'm Angela and you're listening to my Maine Birth, a space where we share the real-life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated, From the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn. We explore the journey of childbirth in all of its beauty, intensity and emotion. Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you. If you are currently expecting, I want to invite you to grab a new download I've created. It's completely free. It's called Conversations with your Care Provider. In this download, you'll get access to my comprehensive list of questions to ask your care provider. This is a valuable resource whether you're in the process of interviewing care providers or if you've already established care. It provides guidance on important topics to discuss and how to assess their answers, allowing you to take charge of your birth journey with confidence. Head over to mymainphotocom to grab your free copy of Conversations with your Care Provider today. Now sit back, relax and join me as we dive into the world of childbirth in Maine and discover the joy, strength and love that is at the heart of every birth story.

Angela: 4:32

Today's birth story guest is Rachel Hollinger, a postpartum doula and chef. She supports mothers in the Belfast and surrounding areas. You can find her online at nourishherdoulacom or on Instagram at nourishherdoula. That's N-O-U-R-I-S-H-E-R-D-O-U-L-A. She shares her two birth stories with us today and highlights the importance of being held in the postpartum period. Hi, rachel, welcome to my Maine Birth. So, to get started, will you share a little bit about you and your family?

Rachel: 5:11

Yeah, absolutely so. My family and I relocated to Maine this past but we've had like a love affair going on with me. We've been trying to buy a house up here, lots and crying every time we left because it has always felt the most like home. So we're just really, really excited to be finally and in a home. And I have two children. I have a two-year-old and a seven-year-old, and my husband works from home and I sort of do as well. I'm a postpartum doula and so I run my practice here in Midcoast Maine. Yeah, and we just finished homeschooling. We've homeschooled up until this point. My daughter is going to be going to a small art school up here this year, so that's a big transition for me as a mother and as a working mother. I'm feeling a whole lot of freedom right now.

Angela: 6:08

Oh my goodness, amazing. So where did you guys?

Rachel: 6:12

move from. So we moved most recently from Pennsylvania to Maine. However, my daughter, my oldest, was born in Colorado, which is where my husband and I met. So my daughter was born in Colorado, my son was born in Pennsylvania and now we live in Maine. So I've got a um, I've got a funny, and even when I had originally reached out to you, I was like I don't know if I qualify to share my story here because my children were born in Maine. But I am, I do. I am a Mainer now, or I guess I can't be qualified as a Mainer and once I like came up out of the ground here.

Angela: 6:49

But I love that you're a doula here and you're offering these services to women here in Maine now, so it's totally applies. I'm really excited to hear your stories.

Rachel: 7:01

Yeah, I'm excited to share. And you're also a chef, right? Yeah, so my degree is in culinary arts, so I worked with food before I became a mother and obviously restaurant work those kind of hours is not conducive to being a mother. So I transitioned to being a postpartum doula shortly after the birth of my daughter, not just because it felt like that was like work that I felt really called to, but it felt like a really nice marriage for me between food and postnatal care. It felt like those two are just kind of like a match made in heaven. So, yeah, now I get to cook for moms, which is just like the most magical thing I love. I love what I do.

Rachel: 7:51

Oh my gosh, I love that so much the postpartum nourishment is really so important, so that's amazing, yeah, yeah.

Angela: 7:55

So let's start with when you first found out you were pregnant with your oldest and a little bit about your thoughts and choosing your care.

Rachel: 8:03

Yeah, well, I guess I didn't have a whole lot of thoughts in choosing my care, which is really funny because getting pregnant with my oldest was my pathway into becoming a birth worker. In so many ways, my daughter was a surprise and that was really difficult. I wasn't. I just was not prepared to be a mother at that point, and I know that happens to many. She's very much loved and wanted, but it took me a while to get my head around being a mom, like okay, yeah, we're doing this. So yeah, she was a surprise.

Rachel: 8:40

And then, very shortly after I found out I was pregnant, I was diagnosed with HG, which is just means that you're really, really sick for the whole nine months. Hyperemesis gravidium is the full name of it, but people just call it HG. Yeah, I found I didn't really get diagnosed until close to 12 weeks, but I was so sick that I had quit my job by six weeks pregnant. So it was like the pregnancy, but it was like a complete life turnaround for me, like everything just kind of stopped. And I don't think that I was.

Rachel: 9:22

I was so unwell that I didn't, and I was also very young and naive that I didn't really like do my homework or do research. I was just kind of head down trying to get through it and um, really struggling with depression through that pregnancy, and so I feel like I didn't receive proper care at all, like hardly at any point during my first pregnancy, birth or postpartum Like I really experienced sort of like the gambit of the depth in women's healthcare in the U S and it's something that I've like grieved through. But it's also I wouldn't have found the work that I do now and like found this really deep piece of me if I hadn't had that lived experience. So in a lot of ways I'm very thankful for it. But it was not an easy pregnancy for me at all. It wasn't like glowy, sparkly, pendersty at all. I really struggled during that time and that's also been important for me to talk about too. You know like we just we don't get to hear many stories like that, but it's definitely the reality for many women.

Angela: 10:38

I feel like yeah, so how did the rest of your pregnancy look?

Rachel: 10:44

Yeah, so HG can be considered a high risk pregnancy just because many HG pregnancies result in loss of baby. So I definitely had a lot of monitoring. I was hospitalized quite a few times just for malnourishment and dehydration. So I was receiving like IV fluids pretty frequently through that pregnancy. Yeah, so I feel like I was getting like, I guess, what you would call the root.

Rachel: 11:15

But, like I said, I didn't even really get diagnosed until 12 weeks, which is when I had switched doctors kind of like out of station because I was just being told that I had morning sickness, because I, when I'm pregnant, I usually I throw up between 32 and 36 times a day, so it's like there is no life outside of it. So I transferred care and my new doctor at our very first appointment like took one look at me and was immediately like why has no one diagnosed? Like why has no one been doing anything for you? Cause I looked horrifying, I was just like dark circles under my eyes and like skin and bones and and she was really great at that point she kind of stepped in and talked about prescriptions and things with me. There's not a whole lot of, there's not many medications for HG to begin with, but there's a few. So I ended up on a medication called Diclegis for anyone who's listening Cause I feel like this was something that was really hard for me to get access to as an HG survivor.

Rachel: 12:20

So I I feel, and I I feel like there's many women who are not sure what their options are as far as that goes. So diathlegics was it's um, it's kind of like the same thing that they give to chemo patients after chemo to curb nausea, and that was really effective for me and sort of like the safest option in terms of medications that you can take. So I started taking that and that improved my quality of life pretty significantly. And so from there on out, I had like pretty standard care. I was shooting for a birth in a birth center. So I was working with a team of midwives at that point, like during the second half of my pregnancy, which felt a lot better than the second half of my pregnancy, which felt a lot better than first half of my pregnancy. I was just kind of like seeing an OB.

Angela: 13:12

So it was the midwife who was finally like okay, this is real and let's do something about it.

Rachel: 13:18

Yeah, yeah. And it was the midwife who kind of like, got a tap, got a read on things and was like this woman is not doing well and I owe her a lot too, because I really think that I probably would have lost the pregnancy if she hadn't stepped in at that point. So yeah, so that care felt a lot better to me, for sure.

Angela: 13:41

So is there anything else you want to mention about that pregnancy, like leading up to when your labor started?

Rachel: 13:48

Oh goodness, it's so funny. It's like seven years ago now feels like a lifetime. But what I do remember about those days leading up to birth is that I really ill prepared for what I was about to go through. But there was so much. My body was just like really at the finish line, like I was just kind of like limping in and I just needed to be done. And many HG pregnancies result in early labor, which was the case for me as well. I was two weeks early, not like crazy early, but I had I was kind of like fading off early labor for quite a few weeks before that. Um, and yeah, my body was just done, I was done, and so I feel like that kind of put me in this head space of like whatever this is about to be cannot be worse than what I've been doing for the last nine months. So I was really all in, yeah, and then it, my due date was actually Christmas Eve and thankfully I was early, as I really did not want to be giving birth on Christmas Eve and yeah. So it kind of just started like really naturally and organically for me at home, kind of just started like really naturally and organically for me at home and labored for most of my labor at home.

Rachel: 15:10

We, like I said, we were living in Colorado at the time and there was a really big blizzard moving through, which I think is actually what put me over the edge, cause that it was a pretty big storm system coming in, so it was just like snowing a lot. It was really cozy system coming in, so it was just like snowing a lot, it was really cozy. I made like a pie because I obviously like I cook when I need stress therapy and I really wanted to be able to eat pie when I got home from the birth center. So I made a pie. I kind of just like cleaned, we were watching movies and snuggling. I mean there wasn't really anything else we could do because it was very snowy and so I felt like pretty relaxed and calm about things at that point and that was about 24 hours of that at home and then it was I think it was fairly late at night it was maybe like 9pm.

Rachel: 16:00

I started to feel like I could not focus on anything, like I didn't want any noise, I didn't want music or TV or you know, like you just start to go into that birth space and my contractions were getting really intense. So we thought, okay, let's head to the birth center. And we I did have a birth doula that I had hired and so we had let her know to meet us there, as well as my sister who was living in Colorado at that point too, and my husband went downstairs to we lived on like the third floor and he went downstairs to get the car out and he's like gone on like one contraction, contraction, two contractions and three contractions I'm like 10 contractions, like where the hell is he? And so I kind of like we had like this long hallway connecting all of the like balconies. You know it was like that kind of an apartment building. So I'm like moaning down the hallway, like going out out to like see where he is. I can look over the edge of the railing and our car was stuck in the snow and I could see him out there like on all fours because somehow our shovel had broke and so he was just like trying to dig the tires out with his arms and I could hear him like yelling to our neighbors and he was just like trying to dig the tires out with his arms and I could hear him like yelling to our neighbors and he was like crying and like my wife is having a baby, like someone, help me get a car out. And it took him quite a while. So I like went back inside and labored by myself. I was like, well, this is not great, I'm just going to try and stay in the zone. He did eventually get it out and the birth center was maybe 20 minutes from our house, but there was. It was so much snow and it was still just like dumping.

Rachel: 17:53

It took us 45 minutes to get there. So that was just like a really excruciating car ride for me. I did not wear a seatbelt, I was just like on all fours in the trunk, like I was like I cannot sit and we, yeah. But we got there and, as if you're familiar with birth centers, usually like they'll want you to be a certain you're supposed to be progressed to a certain place before they admit you. So they checked me and I was only three centimeters, so this had been like 24 hours and I was only three centimeters, so this had been like 24 hours. And because of the snow, thankfully they were like you can stay. Because I was like that. I thought it would be crazy for us to like 45 minutes home again in this.

Rachel: 18:37

So we stayed and things started to feel really intense and, I guess, out of control for me. Once we were at the birth center I also had sort of like this ticking in my mind because the midwife that I really wanted to deliver my baby was on the shift and her shift ended and the midwife coming on after her was one that I felt very uncomfortable around. So I feel like I was starting to like really panic that I wasn't going to have the baby in time. And you know, we had all the lights off and we had my music on and I got in the tub and the tub felt really supportive to me. But internally I was in a really dark place. I feel like I was really spiraling.

Rachel: 19:26

I didn't know how to communicate my needs or how I was feeling verbally Like I just felt like I was closed off from everybody in the room and my doula was like unfortunately, like really not in the picture, like I don't really remember her hardly doing anything through my birth, and that was really hard because it felt like she was just kind of like sitting and watching and my poor sweet sister who is younger than I am in her very like I think she was maybe 20 at the time was really overwhelmed by the situation, like she wanted to be there and be supportive, but obviously it was. It was hard and I was trying to do it. You know, naturally, obviously I didn't have access to an epidural or anything like that at a birth center. So I, my husband, was like they're like never let go of my body, my hands, my hips, but he was like we were not communicating and I don't really remember talking. But he says after the fact that the only things I was saying was either that like really dark things that I wanted to die or I felt like I was dying or I wanted it to be over and that it would just be like that's all I would say. And I just felt like I couldn't handle the pain and we were coming up on 36 hours.

Rachel: 20:56

At this point and also, having come from HG, I really I just had nothing to give, like my body was so done and I was starved and I just like I was completely, just like laid low. I just I felt like I couldn't do it anymore and my midwife I remember her saying that I she thought I needed to get out of the tub and I was just did not. You know like many women was like I'm not get out of the tub and I was just did not. You know like many women was like I'm not getting out of this tub and so they ended up kind of like hoisting me out because I was like I'm not getting out and they were like you need to get out, like we need to kind of switch something up and move things along.

Rachel: 21:42

So as a birth worker now I know that the way that things transpired after this were not like in my best interest, but at the time I didn't understand that. I was just kind of like in la la land. So I, they had me sit on a birth stool, which is really not a good idea If you're a first time mom, it's just. And there was no one supporting my perineum, so, like it's just, it's just kind of like a recipe for tearing.

Rachel: 22:13

And so I, I sat on a birth stool and immediately, like she was crowning and I feel like I just I do remember this the moment really vividly of just feeling like there was like fire in my veins, like I suddenly felt like all of a sudden there was like all this energy coursing through me, and my husband even said he was like I think I saw flames in your eyes, like you became like like a wild woman in a sense and I was just like I, my body needs this to be done, I'm going to be done. And I just delivered her like, and she it was like from like you could maybe see like a quarter of her head, like of her hair to her almost hitting the floor, like she came out in one push and my midwife like barely caught her and she, yeah, she was there and I, like I this is where, like, it's really hard sometimes for me to share this story, cause I feel like people want to want to hear the like. Ah, then I saw my baby and it was love at first sight. They want to hear that and I didn't experience that with my daughter.

Rachel: 23:30

I very quickly spiraled like just sort of like I felt like I just almost like left my body and I was actually hemorrhaging pretty severely at that point Because they I remember them giving me like a shot of Pitocin in my leg pretty quickly and I knew that I was in like extreme amounts of pain. I just couldn't figure out why, and my daughter's head had actually broken my tailbone as she came out and I also had like a third degree tear. So I was not under. I didn't know what was going on with my body. I just knew that I was like not going to be conscious, like I felt very unwell and in like extreme pain. So they kind of like moved me to the bed which is great in a birth center that you have access to, that Cause it just it does kind of feel like being at home. But they moved me to the bed and then I just kind of fainted and I continued to like wake up for like very small amounts of time, like maybe 10 minutes, and then faint again for like hours, like I just couldn't stay conscious and for like hours like I just couldn't stay conscious. And so I do remember them trying to help me get my daughter latched on.

Rachel: 24:51

I remember like my husband talking to me and also them trying to get me out of the bed to pee, but I like fainted and it just was like all like a dream, almost like a weird trippy dream, and so at five hours that you're supposed to leave the birth center and be able to go home, which obviously was not happening for me and I had lost a fairly significant amount of blood. So they did call an ambulance and I was transferred to hospital and that was really traumatic for me because I was separated from my baby and my husband and I was in and out of consciousness so I didn't understand where they were or what was happening. And I got to the hospital they gave me a blood transfusion and like fluid IVs and that did start to help, like I I was able to stay awake at that point, but nobody really told me where my husband or my baby were and it took him like hours to find me and my baby needed to eat. And you know, like it was just. The whole situation was like really alarming for us as new parents and I also like wasn't being treated very kindly by the nurses at the hospital at that point and just kind of like, and they were like telling me to get up and pee and I kept saying I can't, I keep passing out and they no one would come in the bathroom and stay with me and I felt like really scared to do that by myself, cause I was, I was pretty sure I would pass out in there and they kind of made me feel like I was being overdramatic or just like, yeah, they were just like pretty condescending to me. And so, yeah, my husband obviously did find me with the baby and we ended up staying in hospital for three days until I was able to kind of get up and move.

Rachel: 27:01

Um, because obviously my tailbone was causing me very significant amounts of pain and I had, I had sutures, and that too was like a really traumatic experience for me because I they had like numbed me and then it wore off, so they had to do the rest of it without me being numb.

Rachel: 27:23

And now I know that that's, that can be a really common experience for a lot of women, which is just upsetting. But also, I think a lot of my experience within all of this kind of like attests to how ill informed I was and how much I didn't understand like what it would mean for me to advocate for myself or have somebody else advocating for me. And, yeah, I, I just I feel like I want to. I always want to share the birth, my daughter's birth, very truthfully, but I also want to share it as a way to help other women like know their rights and know their options as far as that goes. So yeah, so it was a really difficult hospital stay for us and I obviously didn't want to be there, I just wanted to be in my home. But yeah, that was three days and then we were. We were able to go home, which was a huge relief.

Angela: 28:19

Well, so did your doula come to the hospital with you.

Rachel: 28:23

No, she did not. That was another thing where, yeah, we were just like really upset with the care because because it was I mean, we were young and my husband also has a fine arts degree, we're both artists like we didn't have a lot of money and we really saved to hire her. So it was really upsetting to feel like we actually didn't get any care out of it. I mean, I think I remember her doing counter pressure on my hips like a few times and that's it. It's like I don't remember really any interacting with her at all and she didn't come to the hospital with us. So, yeah, it was. It was. That was really disappointing too.

Angela: 29:02

So how was your postpartum then, after leaving the hospital with her?

Rachel: 29:08

Um, so this story does not get better disclaimer it doesn't get better and that's okay because it is. It's part of my story that I, that I honor and I claim, so I and it was very, very it shaped a lot for me moving forward. But, yeah, my postpartum was the reason I became a postpartum doula, like it, and for many, many people are led to what they like, what they would consider their life's work, through suffering, you know. So, yeah, I had a really tough recovery because I had the sutures, I had a broken tailbone, which isn't like an easy fix, you know. That's like a long healing process and I was really struggling with breastfeeding as well. Oh, and I had a prolapsed bladder. So it really honestly just kind of felt like I was falling apart at the seams, like I really felt like that, and I also felt that I there was just absolutely no one to see, like I still feel flabbergasted that no one recommended me to like a physical therapist, like because of like the prolapse and the tailbone, like that seems really crazy but no one did. And, again, I was a first time mom so I didn't really know that I should go seek that out. So just kind of like weathered the storm, I was on bed rest for nearly three more months with my tailbone and I really struggled with postpartum depression, postpartum PTSD. I was having really vivid nightmares about the birth for every single night for a few months. It was kind of keeping me from sleeping.

Rachel: 30:59

I was very OCD about everything, in an of like feel like I had control over anything that was going on, very protective of my daughter, very like at that point I feel like I had established a real bond and a connection with her which I had mentioned like didn't happen right away, but I at that point I was starting to feel like very mama bear ish, you know, very maternal with her. And yet that sort of for me it was like translating as like you know, not letting anyone else hold her, not letting anyone else like sleep next to her, like just being very overprotective of her. And yeah, we just we didn't. We had friends and community, but I guess, and some people brought us meals, but it mostly just felt like we were really alone. Um, and I felt like I don't.

Rachel: 32:03

After the fact, I felt like was I, was I faking it really well, or was no one seeing, or were people just like seeing how I was and ignoring the fact that I looked and was not doing well, and I don't really know the answer to that. But I do know that very few people asked me about how I was doing and yeah, I, just I, yeah, I just felt like really alone, really isolated, in new motherhood. I had repeated mastitis um was something that was like. That was like a big hurdle of breastfeeding for me and you know everything that comes with that. I had like massive oversupply, like so much milk and clogged ducts and all of that and yeah, it's. It's just deep waters to wade in as a mother and coming off what I would have called a very traumatic pregnancy and birth, I was just sort of like undone by the whole thing and I healed, like over time.

Rachel: 33:16

I started to kind of like find that I felt that way less and less and I did end up getting a therapist, which was really helpful to me.

Rachel: 33:25

But when my daughter was four months old was when I went back to school to become a postpartum doula. So all those three months of hell in bed, in pain, depressed, I just started doing a lot of research. I just started reading and looking at like what are other countries doing, discovering that the US is like one of the wealthiest countries and yet it's like behind pretty much all other countries in terms of postnatal care. And yeah, I just started doing the research and very quickly realized that that's what I wanted to do, that I felt like it had impacted me so greatly that I needed to get into that work and try to help fill in the gap a little bit. And so I think me going back to school to be certified and like starting to like go through the work myself was also very healing to me. It sort of like pulled me up out of that in a lot of ways. And yeah, I've been practicing ever since.

Angela: 34:30

So you're already kind of into the birth world. Then, when you became pregnant for the second time yeah, yeah, so tell me about how that went you found out you're pregnant for the second time and then going through again, like your thoughts this time on choosing your care.

Rachel: 34:48

Yeah, so obviously that's what was so different than the second time, right, and there was also a really big. There's a pretty big age gap between my kids. Like I said, my daughter's seven and my son is two, and that was also intentional on our parts, like because if you have HG, hg is genetic and so you'll, you'll pretty much have it for all of your pregnancies. Sometimes there's like this fluky thing where it skips a pregnancy, so I was crossing my fingers for that did not happen, spoiler alert. But yeah, we just did a lot to prepare.

Rachel: 35:25

Now that we knew what we were up against in having another child, I did a lot of therapy. Personally, my husband and I went through therapy together as a couple. We saved, prepared. I did some natural hormone therapy to really get my body in as good a shape as it could be before doing it again, because hormones can really can greatly affect. Hg is kind of like it can be on a spectrum, so your hormones play a big role in where you land on the spectrum. So I was, um, I was just trying to do everything I could to make it easier. I mean, we had even like when, even when we started trying, I started like cooking meals and putting them in the freezer. I was just like this is not going to get us this time.

Rachel: 36:15

And, yeah, so I I became pregnant when my daughter was five and I actually did lose that pregnancy. So I lost a pregnancy between my two children and that was really hard because my daughter was old enough at this point that she was pretty involved in the fertility process and we really like to keep her. We, we really practice like body awareness in our house and so she was very involved in like mom, did you take your ovulation test? And like you know, just she was just she was really in it. It was kind of like my pal and it was really sweet. So that loss hit her really hard. I mean, it hit all of us hard, but that was kind of, I guess, like that's the question of like, do you involve your kids in that or not, involve your kids in that or not? That's the fear, but for us it felt worth it. So, and then my son was conceived, like I want to say, maybe six months after that loss. So we were able to get pregnant pretty quickly again and, yeah, we, we were ready and it hit just as hard as it did the last time.

Rachel: 37:27

I mean, I think my story, like my pregnancy story and really birth and postpartum with my son, is redemptive in a lot of ways to me. But it also is such a good example of the fact that, like you, can be so the most prepared, resourced person on the planet and motherhood is still hard. It's just hard Pregnancy all of it. And yeah, so I was diagnosed with HG again at five weeks with him and, yeah, just kind of the same as it was before. It was like very quickly I was not able to leave bed and the difference between how I chose my care, like you asked this time, is that I, we were shooting for a home birth. Um, to me that just felt like not only as a birth worker at this point, like I felt like I knew my body and I knew the process well enough, but I also felt really strongly that I still feel strongly that women should be birthing where they feel safest, and for some people that's a hospital and for some people it's a birth center and for some people it's home. So that was the safest place for me. So I, yeah, we had a home birth midwife who I adore and to this day she is an angel to me and she was somebody that I was a colleague already because I was a birth worker. We were referring clients to one another. We would have clients who we're both working with, so I knew her really well and, yeah, she just she's.

Rachel: 39:02

Like I said ahead of time, as I was choosing my birth team, which I was very choosy about, like I interviewed people, I had so many questions and I really feel like we shouldn't be shy to do that, because it's like the most important choice you'll make in your birth and you should just have the people that you feel a hundred percent comfortable with. And I had said, like this birth, I want to be mothered Like my, I want to be intensely mothered. Like I want people to like brush my hair and sing to me and hold me and like feed me. I just I want to be taken care of. That's what feels, that's what allows my body to like get out of that fight or flight mode. And she was exactly that she was. She is like a very maternal person, but she also is, like you know, if shit hits the fan, she's going to be like you need to do this, like you know. So she's very straightforward, but she felt like someone that I could just like be held by right off the bat.

Rachel: 40:10

So, yeah, so she was my midwife and I had a birth doula who was like night and day from my birth doula Again, like a very nurturing, very soft spoken person, and I had met, you know, many times with these women before, so they felt like friends. And then my best friend in the whole world, who I had already been raising babies with, was at the birth or was planning to be at the birth, and she is like, and she was sort of like appointed to be my daughter's person, and my daughter calls her her second mom. So sometimes I'm like I don't know if that's offensive or not, but she's like my second mom will be here. So she was kind of there to hang out with my daughter and, um, and just be there for my husband as well, cause partners need support too, right? So yeah, so that was my team.

Rachel: 41:07

Because I was having a home birth, though this time I could do all my IV fluids from home, like in my bed. I stayed out of the hospital for the whole pregnancy. So that was like such a game changer for me. I knew exactly what medication I needed and I was able to get a prescription at six weeks rather than 12, like it was before. Yeah, so I and I was able to get a prescription at six weeks rather than 12, like it was before. Yeah, so I mean, I was still desperately sick and I still struggled with depression. It was because it was so hard to just not be there for my daughter, like just to drop off the face of the earth and there was nothing I could do about it. I was really struggling with vertigo, which this time, which HG can sometimes cause vertigo. So I was crawling pretty much most because I would fall. So, yeah, it's just completely debilitating and that's hard, no matter how you slice it. So I was much more supported and I think that that was the difference.

Rachel: 42:06

I had people checking in on me and my daughter was like at friends' houses all the time and my midwife was above and beyond the prenatal Like it wasn't even like prenatal visit. She was there all the time. She would just like come in and crawl in bed with me and hook up my IV and then like stroke my hair and talk to me and I we made the decision together, like her and I, to not do any testing during the pregnancy, because it felt like I needed to eliminate any other interventions in the midst of like, how my body was just like struggling to hold this pregnancy. So I didn't do any blood work, I didn't do the glucose test I what else did I not do? I mean I, I didn't do anything.

Rachel: 42:55

I did one ultrasound mid pregnancy because we did want to know what the gender was. That's something that's in the midst of HG, really, really encouraging to me and something I can kind of hold on to. So we found out we were having a boy and we were, of course, like all thrilled because we were pretty sure this was going to be my last pregnancy. But you know, hg, your body doesn't want to go through HG too many times. So we were really excited and HG too many times. So we were really excited and and yeah, so it was like a very low intervention which, honestly, is like pretty miraculous for an HG pregnancy, and I was yeah, and I was home the day I gave birth.

Rachel: 43:39

I it's so different the second time around because you know all the signs and also, being a birth worker, I was like I know exactly what's going on right now. Even the night before I was like I'm pretty sure it's going to happen tomorrow. I just kind of was reading my body's cues. So that's pretty cool to be able to be in that in tune with your body. And that night was a full moon and a really big thunderstorm hit and I was like, oh yes, double whammy, here we go, like this is going to bring this baby. And yeah, I started we were watching a movie after my daughter was in bed and I started having contractions during the movie and then kind of just like curled up in our bed and tried to like rest in between, for I think it was probably about four or five hours and then we they started to get a little bit more intense.

Rachel: 44:38

So I let my midwife know and my doula and my friend and they were all kind of like, okay, we'll start heading that way, because they none of them lived super close to us, so they were all kind of packing up and right around that time is like the thunderstorm had really hit and my daughter woke up because of it and came into our room this was probably like 2 am or something like that and we were just kind of like I was like the baby's coming and it was like this, really like sweet middle of the night, excited, energy, and we were like, let's go sit on the porch and like watch the storm. So we all like put sweaters and blankets and stuff and we went on this was in May, so it's still a little chilly. We all went and sat on the back porch and like watched the storm hit and just kind of like sat in a pile together and I was still having contractions, so I kind of like paced the porch now and then and we took a picture which is still my favorite picture, even though I had like really beautiful birth pictures. It's my favorite one and it's all blurry and dark and it's like the three of us are just like cheesing on the back porch in the middle of the night. It was so special to have her, to have my daughter share that with me and also see that I was like everything. I was happy and I was scared and I was excited and I was happy and I was scared and I was excited and I was grieving because she was, you know, like making this transition with me from being the only to being a sibling and yeah, it was just. It was really beautiful moment for us and and then she went back to sleep, which is like so wild Cause I at the at that point I was like, well, we're really screwed like now we have our daughters like up at 2 am and I'm not even close to having this baby.

Rachel: 46:31

But yeah, she went back to sleep and my, my team got there, everybody got there, and my friend kind of like made me something warm to drink and I just kept laboring and when the sun came up early in the morning I said I really, really want to be outside. So I labored in our back garden with the chickens kind of pecking around and Bea was up at that point. My daughter's name is Bea Beatrice. At that point my daughter's name is B Beatrice and she was kind of running around and playing in her playhouse and like playing with the chickens and I was just kind of laboring. It was so beautiful.

Rachel: 47:15

I was just in my nightgown walking around, although I do think the neighbors we had we had neighbors. Our backyard was like really secluded but there were neighbors within earshot. And it was funny because the next day there was a package of diapers on our front porch and we had told no one. But I was like, oh, they probably heard me because I'm like not a quiet person when I'm in labor. So, yeah, I labored out there until pretty much until I was like okay, it's go time, I want to get in the tub. And so I came inside and we had set the birth pool up in our bedroom. So I got in there, labored for like a pretty short amount of time before I felt the need to push, and at that point my midwife again was just like I can't get to you very well, I really think you need to get out of the tub. And I was like no, not again, I want to have this baby in the water. But I trusted her enough to like I didn't feel like coerced or anything. She was just like what do you think about doing this? And so I was like okay, yeah, that's fine. And I got out and just sort of like knelt at my bed and started pushing.

Rachel: 48:32

And I think that was probably the only time during his labor that I got really scared and felt really out of control, which, again, I think is really common. But I just started having like so many flashbacks to my dot, to pushing with my daughter, and like so scared of breaking my tailbone again and, like you know, it just kind of was like all stored in my body and that moment was really hard. I was crying a lot and but I felt like really supported, like they're all of all. Three of those women were like with me, like literally all of all. Three of those women were like with me, like literally like hands on me and like holding my hair back and stroking my arms and stroking my back.

Rachel: 49:12

And my midwife was like like Rachel, you are good, you can do this. And she was like got behind me and she put the top of her head to the base of my tailbone and her fists on either side like on my hip, so she was almost like like a bowl, like charging down, like against my body, and she said I asked her afterwards like why did you even think I'm doing that? Because that could have ended so poorly for you. You really could have gotten like a face full of I don't even know. She was down there and she was like I knew that I needed to like literally brace that part of your body that you would feel like so safe and so secure, that part of your body that you would feel like so safe and so secure and she just she was like, push into me with like all of your weight and and that's how I delivered my son with her like with her head on my on my tailbone and her fists against me and I yeah, he, I just delivered him right there on the bedroom floor and I had like that, that immediate connection again with him, which was like so incredible for me. It was something that I wanted. I was able to like pull him up to me and immediately like knew him and that was, yeah, that was just such a gift. And my daughter was there too. She, um, my friend had, she was like doing a puzzle with my friend in the other room and my doula was, like, does she want to come in? And she did so. She like watched the whole thing and cut his cord and it was, yeah, it was like so, so magical to also just then be like let me just lay in my own bed and my daughter like got in bed with us too. I didn't hemorrhage, which was amazing. Um, yeah, no broken tailbone.

Rachel: 51:15

And I did tear, but not as as severely as I had with my daughter, I think it was. I had like a really small second degree tear and my midwife and I talked about it and I had so much trauma regarding stitches that we decided to let it heal without sutures, which again is like a pretty amazing thing if you're interested in doing it. But you should obviously talk with your midwife and make sure that she's assessed the wound and like everybody feels like good about it, cause it's not for every case. But yeah, I just put, we applied raw honey to it every day and I kept my knees closed and didn't do any like deep squats for six weeks and it like I just recently had a pap smear and the midwife who did it was like this is your body healed. Incredibly, like I can't even tell that you tore here. So it's pretty crazy what our bodies are capable of. So that made a big difference for me in pain this time around, cause I't have that.

Rachel: 52:18

I feel like the stitches are sometimes more painful than the tearing and yeah, I I felt like I was sort of like set up for success. I was like that was like pretty great, I think I'm doing really well. And so the birth yeah, that I would say that was like the close of the birth and my friend had brought me like toast with like tons of butter and honey and like soft scrambled eggs on top of it and cocoa, and it was like, oh my God, it was the best thing I'd ever tasted. So I ate that in bed right after. And yeah, and everyone just kind of stayed and cleaned everything up for us and left us all tucked in and I was kind of like put a bow on it, like that was pretty great, um, and yeah, yeah, just like a really redemptive birth for me.

Angela: 53:12

Oh my gosh, that's beautiful. So how was your postpartum then the second time?

Rachel: 53:18

Yeah, so yeah, I guess that's I would have. I kind of thought it was like, okay, this is great, like I'm going to be great, and I was not. I was really surprised by how my postpartum went and again, it's one of those situations where it's like I really feel like I needed to experience certain things to add a depth and a richness to my work, and this was one of them. I so I was breastfeeding, like I mean, I felt like I was breastfeeding, but my son had a jaw injury during birth. So like the bottom of his like his bottom jaw was sort of sideways, a little bit like crooked, and so because of that, all of his like fascia and tissue was like very tight and he was really struggling to latch. Like his latch was just like the smallest latch in the world. He would come at me with like this tiny little O mouth and I would be like how am I supposed to get my nipple in there? Like that's wild. And he was. He was like really tight, like really clamping down. So I noticed that like in the first 24 hours with him and I had an amazing lactation consultant again who was a colleague of mine and so she was like there immediately and she was at our house quite a bit, so I'm very thankful for her. So she was able to kind of like get a look at things and she was like, okay, it's not great, and recommended that we see like a craniosacral therapist and a chiropractor and so we were planning to do those things.

Rachel: 55:03

But it was like I was trying the first night I was trying to breastfeed him and he wasn't like. He wasn't really. I didn't feel like he was on or transferring anything and he was sleeping like so much Like I. It wasn't like. He was like waking, hungry, like we would wake him after like five or six hours and he would still not eat. So I started to like panic and my milk started to come in and I have oversupply, so I'm like you know, have so much milk and he's not drinking it and, um, I guess it was night number two.

Rachel: 55:43

I just it felt like postpartum depression like came for me in the night. That night, like I, I felt like, okay, when I went to bed and I was like a completely different person in the morning. I just I was like like having like hand tremors, like I couldn't hold anything. My hands were shaking so hard and I like could not hold him. I could not like hold him or care for him at all, like my husband was doing it. I was like so incapacitated I could not stop crying. I wasn't eating, I was just like. I guess in my head I just thought my baby doesn't want me like, and that's sort of like what the initial thought was.

Rachel: 56:35

That spiraled out of control and my husband called my midwife again. Who's just my angel. And she was just there, like in the middle of the night, like I I didn't even know he had called her, but I just remember feeling her come into the room and like get down beside the bed and she didn't even like say anything to me, like necessarily. She just said she was just like open your mouth, honey, that's. I just remember her saying open your mouth, and she just like squirted a tincture into my mouth that was like for depression and she was like're just she had brought donor milk and she fed my son and helped take care of my son and then was like making me meals and just there and again like this was my midwife, like totally not what we paid her for, like this was above and beyond. And she stayed at our house for like nearly two days, just trying to get our family back like to a good place, and I continued to try to breastfeed my son but my nipples were like just bleeding all the time, like it was like in my lactation consultant, was like we were doing everything.

Rachel: 57:58

And I started to get mastitis again and I got it six times in a row. This time I would just like have it for a week and then not have it for a week, and have it for a week and not, and so the last time I got it it turned into MRSA and then I was like very sick and at that point we had tried so many antibiotics even and I'm not even somebody who typically uses a lot of medications but I was like desperate to not be sick anymore. We cultured my milk, trying to figure out like what in the world was making like was it laying dormant in my body or like what in the world was making like it wasn't laying dormant in my body or like what was going on here and it was just a combination of my son not being able to transfer milk. And even with all, we did a lot of therapies and we reversed a tongue and a lip tie for him and even still like wasn't, it was making it the smallest amount of difference.

Rachel: 58:57

And I was starting to just have an aversion to my son even, because anytime I was with him I was just in like massive amounts of pain. And I remember my midwife and my lactation consultant were both there and they were like sitting on the foot of my bed and I was just, I was so unwell. I like unwell physically, but I was so unwell in my mind and my spirit, like I felt like I didn't even know who I was anymore, like I cried constantly, like I just never stopped crying and I was having panic attacks that were like pretty severe, every single day, like just daily, and I felt like I didn't even want to hold my son. And my midwife was just like and I I will always thank her for saying this to me and I've now said this to clients over the last few years is that like there is nothing. What she said was there is nothing more important than your bond with your child, not even breastfeeding, and I just I needed somebody to say that to me Like we have such high breastfeeding goals like, especially in the United States.

Rachel: 1:00:10

It's like kind of went from one extreme to the other, where it used to be like more. You used to be like a weird hippie if you breastfed, and then now you're sort of shamed if you don't. And I just felt that pressure. I felt like, as a birth worker, I should be doing this, I, I I just fought for it for so long and so that day I decided to start weaning and so I started, I switched to pumping and at that point, you know, he, my son, was on breast milk until like for five months. Um, by the time we even needed to supplement with formula. But then we did. Supplement with formula was really hard for me. Lots more crying, lots more support from my community. It was just really humbling for me and my profession. It was hard for me to make that decision, but it was 100% the right decision Because the minute I stopped breastfeeding, my bond with my son was repaired, felt like almost overnight, because I could just hold him and cuddle him and love him and there was like I didn't have to be in pain, I didn't have to like go through the whole like sweaty anxiety filled, like moment of trying to get him to latch. And so, yeah, it was, it was the right decision.

Rachel: 1:01:40

And then right around that, the time that I decided not to breastfeed, which was at eight weeks postpartum, I started depression medication as well, and that was also another really hard decision for me. I like could not even I even had the prescription for a while and couldn't bring myself to take it. There was just so much stigma around it for me and I realized that I had like bias against it that I didn't even realize I had as a birth worker. I just I started to realize like that I might've even like said things to clients or to mothers before, without realizing it, that would have made them feel less than because they needed it and or like that it shouldn't be a viable option. And yet I was just sitting there realizing that I was unable, like at that point I was having suicidal thoughts, I was not able to be present with my family anymore.

Rachel: 1:02:42

I was I, it was just completely had taken over my life and I knew that I needed that help. It was just and it was kind of crazy that like expectations that I had, or that I expectations from other people in my community, were keeping me from doing something that was like so obviously the right choice. So that took me a little, a little while, but then, yeah, I so I started, I switched to pumping and I started taking depression medication and my life just like totally transformed. It was like a I mean, it was a slow, it got better slowly, but that it was like a pretty big difference right off the bat and, yeah, and that also really shaped the way that I care for mothers and the way that I view maternal mental health and, yeah, it just gave me a lot of compassion and understanding for what that would actually feel like, whereas before I feel like I didn't know like how crippling it really could be. So I was really open about that my whole journey through pregnancy, birth and postpartum with my son, because at that point I had like a substantial Instagram following for my doula account and so I just kind of was like I did like daily diaries through my HG experience.

Rachel: 1:04:10

And then I, when I got to that point, it was like this really hard thing of like, do I share about this too? Like, do I tell people that I'm taking medication? Do I tell people that I'm not breastfeeding? And I decided to. Do I share about this too? Like, do I tell people that I'm taking medication. Do I tell people that I'm not breastfeeding? And I decided to and I actually I. There were some like there were some hate messages that I got, which was hard, but there was mostly just like an overwhelmingly positive response and I felt really supported in that decision and it also opened up conversations that I feel like I needed to have, or maybe others needed to have, surrounding that and yeah, and that's that's kind of how that went and my son and I now have a really beautiful bond with one another. That's just magic. So it didn't. Ultimately, I still feel that I chose the better thing, which was a relationship with my son, for sure.

Angela: 1:05:10

So if you were to now give advice to someone who's expecting, or even new parents, what would be the biggest thing that you would kind of say, or even new parents, what would be the biggest thing that you would kind of say, oh wow.

Rachel: 1:05:31

I mean, I think something that I say often, especially when I'm working with first time parents, is to remind them that you are having a baby, not a birth.

Rachel: 1:05:38

So you're going to be a mother for the rest of your life or a parent for the rest of your life, and that means we can't throw all of our energy and our resources towards just the birth.

Rachel: 1:05:50

You know, it's like maybe 24 hours of your life and then there's so much more after that. Um, so, to keep a broader picture, and even though sometimes it's hard to think past the birth, because that's like just biological what our bodies are doing, you know we're like everything's pointed towards that moment to really think through like what your postpartum team is going to look, like what you're like build your village and who's gonna, in the long term, help take care of you and support you in this, and even like in the first year, that like postpartum is forever, but it's, you know, that whole first year requires support. I can't even tell you how many clients I work with past the six week mark. You know, like that's really when it gets almost even harder sometimes because the meals stop coming and people stop asking how you're doing and it's still really hard. So, yeah, that you're having a baby, not a birth, I think that's probably what I would say.

Angela: 1:06:54

Yeah, oh my gosh, it's so, true, true. So now tell me more about your doula business and a little bit more about the things that you offer yeah, I'd love to.

Rachel: 1:07:09

Uh, my family and I live in Belfast and so I work with families within like an hour radius of that. It kind kind of depends Like sometimes I'll drive a little bit over because it's hard for me to say no if there's somebody that needs support. So that usually like it's kind of like down towards Brockland and then like up into the Blue Hill Peninsula and, yeah, I work with in-person and remote clients. But if I'm working with a family in person, it usually looks like home visits and so each home visits like three to six hours and I might do usually food is a huge piece. Obviously we talked about like that's my background and I just think it's like so much fun to make really beautiful like food targeted towards the postpartum period. That's just like elegant and beautiful and plated for like someone sitting there in an adult diaper. I just think it's great and I feel like moms don't get access to that kind of care very often. So I'll usually do food, food to eat on there and then to pack away until my next visit, so you have something to work through. And then like emotional and mental support, birth processing, breastfeeding, sleep solutions, bottle feeding, baby care, herbal care, all of that, all of that good stuff, and then often just taking the baby so mom can take a nap or take a shower, doing all the dishes in the sink, just kind of generally coming in like a fairy godmother and making sure that everything is taken care of. But I think the main thing about my practice is that I like to specify is that it's mother centric, meaning that, like there's much of the postnatal care in the U S is baby centric, so focusing on, like, baby's care and anything surrounding the baby. And I'm coming in and focusing solely on the mother and really believing that the mother's health and well being is the center of the family. So if the mother is well, the baby as well. So that's kind of how I practice.

Rachel: 1:09:17

And then I also run a support circle for mothers here in the Belfast area and I have another business where I host retreats for mothers. So our next one is actually going to be in Southport in Maine. We kind of do them all over the place and the goal is also to take them international. But our next one is in Southport at the end of September and I'm really excited about that.

Rachel: 1:09:42

We basically just love up the mother, we mother the mother and there's just lots of yoga and beautiful food and breath work and sleeping in and hot baths and swims and all of that good stuff. So I run that with my business partner, who's also a mother that good stuff. So I run that with my business partner, who's also a mother, and then I just write and speak and teach a lot on mother care too. So I kind of wear a lot of hats. But if you want to get in touch with me, you can do that on my website, which is nourishherdoulacom, or my Instagram is nourishherdoula and, yeah, you can find more information there. I also have a cookbook and other resources on my website that I've written for mothers who are interested in using food as medicine in the fourth trimester.

Angela: 1:10:31

Wow. Oh my gosh, that's very cool. I'm going to link all of your information in the show notes. So if anyone has trouble with the spelling or anything, actually can you just spell that for anyone that might be listening. But I am going to link all of your information in the show notes.

Rachel: 1:10:46

Yeah, my Instagram is N O U R I S H E R Dula D O U L A.

Angela: 1:10:57

Okay, perfect, awesome. Yeah, that is incredible. I remember like I really was focusing on putting like my team together, like my birth team for my youngest daughter's birth, and I wanted a chef so badly. I think that's just an incredible like combination that you have there. That's just like so amazing, and I hope this reaches more mothers who might also want amazing food in addition to that support postpartum. It's incredible that you do both of those.

Rachel: 1:11:32

Yeah Well, I wish you would have had that too, because everyone deserves really beautiful food.

Angela: 1:11:38

Well, my husband's a pretty good chef, so I was pretty lucky. Oh, that's amazing To have that support where both parents can really just focus on the new addition to the family and just have that bonding time together Even if people in the family are good at cooking to have that support come in and make the food and all the things you know that might need to be handled. So the family can really just focus on bonding and all those special special moments. Those first, those first few weeks.

Rachel: 1:12:09

Yeah, yeah, I mean, I feel like so many times like if you have a really supportive partner or husband, it's easy to be like, well, they're basically my doula because they're amazing, but it's also kind of unfair to that person as well, because they're probably sleep deprived. They're going back to work, they're also like becoming a parent, whether it's the first or the fourth time. So it just makes a lot of sense to have somebody else, freeing both of you up to also support one another and just to have like that like maternal, feminine, like presence in the home. I feel like is really like built into our needs, like generationally, like that's what we would have had. I feel like it's an important piece of what we continue to have as as women and people with uteruses that give birth. You know, like it's just it's incredibly nourishing.

Angela: 1:13:03

Yes, oh my gosh, I love all of that. Well, thank you so much, rachel, for sharing your stories today.

Rachel: 1:13:11

Yeah, Thank you for opening up a platform for me to do so. I feel really, yeah, really thankful for that. You have like a place that's like supportive and healthy to do this Cause. Sometimes, if we don't have a place to share birth stories, we like blurt them out in the line at checkout at a grocery store to some unsuspecting pregnant woman. You know like I feel like it systemically has been an issue that women don't get heard on this. So thank you for having a safe environment for people to share.

Angela: 1:13:44

And that's the end of another episode of the My Maine Birth podcast. Thank you for joining me and listening. I hope that the stories shared here have been inspiring and informative to all of my listeners. If you're looking to capture your own birth story, I highly recommend considering my birth photography services. I'm a professional photographer and I'm very passionate about capturing the raw and emotional moments of the birthing process, and I designed a personalized and intimate photo album, creating a beautiful and lasting memory of one of the most special moments of your life. For more information, head over to mymainphotocom and schedule a call with me. Thanks again for tuning in and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories. Don't forget to subscribe and leave me a review, and I'll see you back here again next week.