MyMaine Birth, Molly’s empowering precipitous home birth that involved a shoulder dystocia and a transfer to Maine Medical Center to care for her sons broken arm, in a snow storm.

MyMaine Birth Podcast - Episode 17, Molly’s empowering precipitous home birth that involved a shoulder dystocia and a transfer to Maine Medical Center to care for her sons broken arm in a snow storm.

Welcome to MyMaine Birth, a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state’s biggest hospitals to birth center births, and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated. From the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn, we explore the journey of child birth in all of its beauty, intensity, and emotion. Whether you are a soon to be mom, seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you!

If you are looking to capture your own birth story, I highly recommend considering my Portland Maine birth photography services. I am a skilled professional Portland Maine Birth photographer and am very passionate about capturing the raw and emotional moments of the birthing process.

I design a personalized and intimate photo album, creating a beautiful and lasting memory of one of the most special moments of your life. For more information head over to https://www.mymainephoto.com/birthphotography

Today’s birth story guest is Molly and we are going to be hearing her share about her experience of beginning her pregnancy care with an Obstetrician but then she made the decision to switch to a Certified Professional Midwife at 24 weeks pregnant. Her labor was very fast and ended with a shoulder dystocia. Her son had a broken arm and they needed to transfer to Maine Medical Center in the middle of a snowstorm! She said that her birth taught her that home birth can still be empowering and so worth it, even if it doesn’t go how you envisioned it, and even if a hospital transfer is required.

Join me and listen here to hear my conversation with Molly. Scroll down for the full transcript!

Angela: Hi Molly, welcome to MyMaine Birth. To start will you share a little bit about you and your family?

Molly: Hi!

Angela: So to start, will you share a little bit about you and your family?

Molly: Yeah, so it’s me and my fiancé Zach. Before we had our baby boy we had a cat named Andy and that is about it.

Angela: Alright, can you share a little bit about when you found out you were pregnant in Maine and the care that you chose.

Molly: So I found out I was pregnant last June, and before getting pregnant I had heard about home birth, I had listened to some stories that I thought were amazing. And before getting pregnant I thought that I would probably go that route, but when I got pregnant - I thought about it, and the cost - and because I was still 25 and on my Mom’s insurance I thought it might be easier to go with the obgyn I had been seeing for genealogical care. So I started with an Obstetrician and I think I kept seeing my Maine obstetrician until about 24 weeks pregnant. It was right before the glucose test when I start thinking maybe I did want to switch to a midwife. The main reason was because we had started talking about what birth would be like - and my obstetrician mentioned that it wasn’t guaranteed that she was going to be there for my birth - it could have been any of , I think 9 Obstetritians - and I may not have even met all of them before giving birth and I wasn’t super comfortable with that. So around I think 24 weeks pregnant I started looking for a Maine home birth midwife. I actually ended up having a post recommended to me on Instagram that my midwife had shared that she had one more opening in February. I looked at her website and looked at what she had to say and was so interested and immediately set up an interview with her and went with her from there on.

Angela: Do you want to share who your midwife was?

Molly: Yes it was Ariel Bernstein, she was on your podcast a couple weeks ago.

Angela: Awesome! So you switched care to https://www.sacorivermidwifery.com at 24 weeks pregnant. Can you describe your first appointment?

Molly: Yeah, well the interview was about an hour. I got to ask her about what she thought about all different types of care and different means of giving birth - like where and how - and all that. I really liked her philosophies and also her experience really impressed me. But at our first actual appointment it was again an hour long and it was very intimate and we talked about a lot more than just birth and pregnancy and it was clear that she really cares about connecting with everyone she works with on a very personal level. And that made me feel very comfortable and safe, not like just a person on a list of a bunch of other patients where you just kind of have to get things done. Also when she sent me all of the paperwork for different interventions and tests - everything had a list of pros and a list of cons for both options and I was allowed to deny tests if I wanted to and I was allowed to take different routes if that is what made me comfortable. So that felt AMAZING! One other reason I had really decided to switch to a midwife also was - at one point the Maine Obstetrician kind of handed me a folder of papers that kind of just - it was like, here are all of the things that we are going to do and you are going to have to do - and none of it had Options. And I think that also made me uncomfortable too - just not being able to opt for certain things or opt out.

But it was totally different with Ariel, everything was a choice, and everything was very informed. It was clear that she wanted me to feel as educated as possible on all of the different options. I had my 20 week ultrasound before switching, And then instead of taking the glucola for the glucose test I took Fresh Test I think it is called - it's like a lemonade powder kind of thing - and that was all clear. For the Group B Strep test I did opt to do that - but I chose that if it was positive I was going to forego antibiotics - but it was clear so that wasn’t an issue either. And I think that was pretty much all of the tests. I didn’t have any cervical checks leading up to birth. She would just find the heartbeat every appointment and palpate my belly a little bit. For a while he was breech - for quite a long time - I think until about 34/35 weeks. So for awhile I was very stressed that this home birth couldn’t even happen. Because obviously it’s not legal for a Certified Professional Midwife to attend a breech home birth (yet) - so I was doing everything I could to flip him. And then at one appointment we discovered he had flipped, so that was a good feeling!

Angela: So when did your labor start?

Molly: So I think I was 40 weeks and 3 days, so I was a little bit past my due date. I remember it was a really beautiful day, there was no clouds - it was weirdly warm for February - but the next day was going to be a huge snowstorm. And I actually had an appointment scheduled with Ariel for the next day - and my Mom encouraged me to reschedule it and see if she could do it that day. My mom was like - I don’t want you driving in the snow. So I rescheduled with Ariel, I took a long walk with my Mom in the morning and I went to see Ariel at about 3pm I think. We had a long appointment. We actually talked about the next few weeks, like if I continued to not go into labor - like the care, what we could do for the next couple weeks - like maybe getting some ultrasounds or just making sure the baby is ok. And we kind of joked - well you know babies like to come with storms - she did make a comment like that. So I left at about 4pm and I remember driving home and feeling like a little off - nothing felt wrong, I wasn’t having contractions or anything - but I just felt kind of spacy I guess.

I got home around 4. I was just hanging out with Zach in the living room, and then at about 5pm I stood up off the couch - and my water just broke - and it was like a lot of liquid! Like a big gush. I was kind of shocked, because I had been telling anyone that would listen for the longest time throughout my pregnancy - like it doesn’t happen like that in real life, it’s not like the movies, your water doesn’t just randomly break - but mine did. So that was surprising, and I called Ariel and told her that my water had broken. She had me test with a little q-tip thing and it turned dark so that meant that it was Amniotic fluid. So she told me to try to sleep and eat and get some rest and kind of just gear up for when things started going.

So Zach’s Dad brought us some Thai food, which was really nice. So I ate, and I took a shower. And then around I think like 8:45 I tried getting into bed to get some sleep - and the second I laid down I had a pretty strong contraction and was like - whoa, what was that. Up until that point I didn’t have any contractions that were particularly noticeable or anything. So I felt it out and it kind of ended and I was like ok now I’ll get some sleep because I figured the next one would be coming in like half an hour or maybe 20 minutes - but then pretty quickly I felt another one. I was like - huh that weird, that seemed pretty quick. So then maybe one or two more contractions that seemed kind of weirdly close together - I called Zach and I was like - I think we might want to try timing these. And I think the first two that we timed were about maybe 7 minutes apart and lasting 30 second or more. I was convincing myself in my head - this isn’t right - we must be timing them wrong - because this isn’t how early labor is supposed to be. And they were pretty strong so I was very surprised, and kind of just convincing myself that this is early labor and I must just be being a wimp and timing them wrong. So we kept timing them, and I knew that I was supposed to call her when they were 4-5 minutes apart lasting a minute long for an hour. That interval of contractions. And within about an hour they were consistently 4-5 minutes apart and lasting a minutes - and they were very strong.

So this whole time I was just roaming from room to room and squatting and leaning on tables - and bureaus - and eventually I was back in bed just on my hand and knees. I remember hitting a point where it was getting really intense and I was kind of just chanting to myself - I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. And I think around that point Zach was like, we have to call Ariel now. And I was like it hasn’t been a full hour yet, it’s going to be too early - she’s going to get here and be waiting forever. And he was like - no we have to call her. So I think it was almost 10pm when he called Ariel to come. And I would think she was probably surprised I’m guessing - because it was so soon after - but by this point I was really vocalizing through my contractions, so she could probably hear me over the phone. So she rushed over, got there at about 10:20 or maybe 10:30 and at that point I was really in the zone, I could barely talk - I was kind of just breathing and vocalizing and rocking back and forth on my hands and knees.

I remember her showing up and coming into the bedroom and saying something very reassuring like - you have done so much good work. And at that point I think Zach was trying to figure out the birth pool was struggling to figure out the hose - so I could kind of remember him trying to figure that out in the background - but I was very much in my own head. And I remember saying - I have to go to the bathroom, so I tried that - but of course I didn’t actually have to go to the bathroom, things were just moving really quickly. So I got out of the bathroom and had a contraction that literally took me to my knees - so I was outside the bathroom on my hands and knees and Ariel was like - lets move into the living room - I had a yoga mat on the floor so I was down on my hands and knees on the yoga mat - and Ariel was kind of just there with me. Then she asked if she could do a cervical check and this was the first one that I had gotten in all of pregnancy or labor - and she could already feel the head. So I was like - whoa, ok - thinks are actually happening. So from there I totally lost track of the timing of things. At that point I told her it feels like he is coming - like I feel like I have to push. So we moved into the bedroom and I think she checked his heart rate and it wasn’t fantastic - he was under a little bit of stress - so she had me lay on my side in bed and do some pushing on my side, and then switch sides. His heart rate got stronger and steadier with the side pushing. I’m not sure what time this was - I’m guessing between 11 and 11:30 and around that time Zach called my Mom because she was supposed to be there for the labor - that was part of my plan - but it all happened so fast it was like, whoa I’m pushing! I probably would have forgotten to even call her - but Zach gave her a call and she rushed over. Ariel then called the midwife who was going to assist her, who was Tiffany Skillings - and she is fantastic as well! So I think her and my Mom showed up at about the same time - maybe between like 11:30 or 11:45.

Angela: Was it snowing at this point?

Molly: I’m sure it was - all of the shades were closed so I kind of totally forgot that there was a huge blizzard going on - but yes, they were driving in the snow. Also this comes up a little later - but there had been a car accident on the street that my street connects to - so not sure if they ran into that at all, but that was also going on. So yeah, they rushed over, it must have been snowing a lot by then.

So the next series of events was even more - kind of - hazy for me. I don’t know about the timing. I don’t know when the midwives realized that he was stuck and wasn’t really coming out - I’m not sure when his head presented. But the mood kind of shifted to become pretty urgent. I could feel the sense of urgency - like the baby needs to be born, he needs to come out. So I switched positions a few times, very quickly - I was down on the birth stool I remember, and then the birth stool moved - or Zach told me later that he was holding up all of my weight - just under my arms. So I was just kind of squatting with my weight in his arms for a little while.

Then we moved to hands and knees and I think maybe that’s when his head was completely out basically - but his shoulders were stuck. I remember in my birth class the instructor had talked about shoulder dystocia, so I vaguely knew what it was, and I could almost remember thinking in the moment - like huh, I know his head came out I felt it - and from other birth stories I had heard its usually one other big push and then the body comes out. But that wasn’t happening. So I kind of had this sense that something was going on. But my midwives just kept encouraging me - just keep breathing, keep pushing - we’ve got to get him out. But the position changes weren’t helping. So at some point Ariel had to reach in and unstick his arm. And she kind of thinks that his elbow was up by his head basically. and his whole arm was stuck behind my pubic bone. So when she moved his arm - he came right out.

He did need some resuscitation, he didn’t cry right away which was very scary. I was still on my hands and knees and I could see in between my legs - them stimulating him - and it didn’t take too long and then he was crying, and that was the biggest sense of relief I have ever felt in my life. But during that whole time I remember just telling him - I love you so much, you can do it. And my midwives kept saying - just take deep breaths, you can breathe for him. Because he was still attached to his umbilical cord - that hadn’t been cut or anything.

So I just tried to focus on taking really deep breaths that would help him. So once he got going and was crying and breathing well - they handed him to me - between my legs, and helped me lay back on the floor. I just held him and waited for the placenta to be born. And once the placenta was out, I moved to the bed and just kept holding him. They had a little oxygen mask for him that I was holding just above his mouth - to help his oxygen come up. And he was just laying on my chest when they did all of the newborn exams and check ups. And pretty quickly my midwives noticed that his left arm - the one that was stuck - wasn’t moving quite normally. I think he could swing it out but then couldn’t really bring it back in very easily. So Ariel let me know, pretty quickly that she thought transferring would be a good idea - to get his arm checked out.

We weren’t in a huge rush because we knew his breathing and his heart rate were all good - but we knew that transferring would be a good idea for him. And then after she checked me out - it was also kind of suggested for me as well - because I had pretty significant tearing. Both I’m guessing - because of the shoulder dystocia and also because my labor was super fast.

He was born at 12:08 - so I had contractions from about 8:45 to midnight basically - so just a little over 3 hours. A whirlwind of a labor, and a really intense birth. So we waited a while and then around 2:30 in the morning - Ariel started coordinating with the Ambulance to come pick us up.

Angela: Was it still snowing really hard when the Ambulance came?

Molly: Yes! That was actually the first time that I even - realized it was snowing. I totally forgot up until that point. So the ambulance showed up and then all of a sudden 4 EMT’s were in my house - and they were all very nice. It must have been a weird scene to walk into - in a lot of ways, but they were very respectful - and very kind. First we had to figure out how we were going to transfer my son. My Maine midwives had this little - mini stretcher board that they thought would be good to transfer him in - just so we didn’t have to get him into a car seat with his arm and everything. But the EMT’s were uncomfortable with that - I think mostly because of the snow and the storm. So we got him in a car seat - just a few hours after birth, poor thing - but he was a trooper and just sleepy. So we got him loaded up in the Ambulance and Ariel and I rode with him - and my mom and Zach took their own car.

We don’t live very far from Maine Medical Center - I think in normal circumstances - only 10/15 minutes. But it took quite a bit longer than that, because they were driving very carefully - because of the snow. And then they mentioned the car accident down the street, and that was why it had taken them a while to get to us. But we got to Maine Medical Center and we got right up to a room - and some people came to check him out.

And this was the tough part for a while - because we did have to be separated from him for awhile because they had to take some x-rays of his arm. He did go to the NICU for a little bit - but it was only maybe an hour - and they were like - he doesn’t need to be here. So while he was getting all checked out, I sent Zach to be with him - and my Mom stayed with me. And I was having a really hard time with the sutures. They gave me a bunch of lidocaine, but it wasn’t strong enough for me - at that point. I think it was really painful and I was super stressed - and just not able to calm down very well. So eventually I made the call to have it done in an operating room - with a spinal tap. Which ended up being very worth it - but also very ironic. Leading up to birth I didn’t want an epidural and I didn’t want any pain management - but I did end up needing a spinal tap for kind of - not my birth, but my after birth. It was the only way I could deal with it, so I am very grateful that it was available and that I could go that route.

So after all that, I think it was maybe 6am that I was back in the room - and my son got back to the room and we were all good and he could just be back on my chest. That was just the best feeling being back with him. Ariel was amazing, she stayed with me the entire time - all night in the hospital which was so nice. We ended up staying the whole next day and I think we stayed another night actually. So in some ways - I had my Maine home birth - but I ended up spending significantly more time - at the hospital. Which I think was also kind of ironic - but I think worth it - because we were both checked on overnight - and everyone was just making sure we were ok. So that was nice.

Angela: So what did they do for your sons arm?

Molly: Yeah, so they really didn’t do much. We were kind of surprised by this too. They basically gave us a safety pin and said to pin his arm to his onesie. So luckily it was winter, so he was in long sleeved onesies anyway. But basically for the first two weeks he was alive - he had his arm just pinned to his onesie - kind of like a sling. But no cast or anything like that. We took him to a pediatric orthopedic doctor - he got more x-rays. The two pieces of bone were moving together - which was a good sign. And he hadn’t moved his left arm, basically at all for the first week. which we were pretty concerned about. But they told us with infants - they kind of, I forget what he called it - but their brain basically tells them to paralyzed the limb, just to keep it safe.

I think he was 3 weeks old when he started moving it - in different parts - like his hand would move a little bit. And then very quickly from his 3rd to 4th week he started moving it a lot. That is when we stopped pinning it entirely, because we figured it would probably be best if he could experiment with moving it. And then we had a second follow up with the orthopedic doctor and basically what they said happened - is this giant bone callous formed around the break - so on his arm you could feel had a pretty big bump on it - that was keeping the bone together. And as he grows that callous will slowly slim out - and it already has a little bit. He is 11 weeks old now, and he moves him arm totally normally - you really couldn’t even tell at this point that it had ever been broken. Which is crazy to me. Just absolutely insane. Kind of a miracle, because it was his humorous bone - which is the big arm bone - so if that had happened to an adult he would still be healing and in a lot of pain.

But babies are just incredible, and they heal so quick - so that has been really, really encouraging. And other than seeing the Orthopedic doctor - we started taking him to a chiropractor around 6 weeks. My Maine midwives suggested that could be helpful with him - just considering the birth and the stress of it. And then I also saw a lactation consultant at about 5 weeks - because he was having some latch issues and ended up having a tongue tie - and she also suggested that some chiropractic care could be really helpful for that as well. So he has been working with a chiropractor for some neck tightness - and that has been helping quite a bit.

Angela: So has the chiropractic help been helping with nursing and latching?

Molly: I think so. We did get the tie released, he had a tongue and a lip tie, they released both - and things have improved a lot since then - for sure. I think the chiropractic care is helping more continuously and I also had a bunch of little exercises I have been doing with him - with his tongue and mouth - and I think that helps too.

Angela: What would your advice be for expecting or new parents?

Molly: I would say that what I ended up feeling about birth is that there is very little you can control about it. Pretty much the only thing you can try to control about it are where it happens, and who it happens with. So when you are thinking about how you want to give birth - I think the who and the where are really important. Where are you going to feel safest and the most yourself. Who you are going to feel the safest with - and whether that is with a Maine midwife or a Maine Obstetrician or a Maine Hospital or a Maine Birth Center or a Maine Home birth - all of the options are super valid - it’s all just about what you want. And for me I definitely felt very safe at home with my Maine midwives and then after birth I felt very safe at the hospital and getting that level of care - when it was necessary. And for anyone who is planning a home birth - I think it is worth it to do some mental preparation for transfers - understanding that its not a failure and sometimes it is necessary and it is helpful and it is nothing to be ashamed about. I think for a little bit I think I felt maybe guilt, or like I failed in some way because I had to transfer - and I eventually realized that’s not the case. It was still worth it for me to have my Maine home birth but I am super grateful the hospital was there when we needed it. And I would definitely recommend seeing a lactation consultant to anyone who may be struggling with breastfeeding. It helped my baby and I a whole bunch and I am super grateful that we are continuing to breastfeed even after having some issues. So yeah, that’s pretty much it.

Angela: Alright, well thank you so much Molly for sharing your birth story today!

Molly: Thank you so much for having me

And that’s the end of another MyMaine Birth Podcast! Thank you for joining me. I hope the stories shared here have been inspiring and informative to all of my listeners.

If you are looking to document your own birth story I highly recommend considering my Portland Maine Birth Photography services. I am a skilled professional, Portland Maine Birth photographer and am very passionate about capturing the raw and emotional moments of the birthing process. And, I also design a personalized and intimate photo album, creating a beautiful and lasting memory of one of the most special moments of your life. For more information head over to https://www.mymainephoto.com/birthphotography and schedule a Complimentary Zoom Consultation with me.