50. MyMaine Birth: Kally’s Maine Birth Stories - from hospital to home birth with loving care from her midwife at Northern Sun Family Healthcare
Welcome to episode 50 of the MyMaine Birth Podcast! Todays birth story guest is my good friend Kally and she shares about her experience birthing her oldest daughter Iris in a hospital and also about the home birth of her youngest daughter Lois with the incredible care of Sarah Ackerly from Northern Sun Family Healthcare in Topsham.
I have been photographing Kally and her family for a while now, and I am so excited to share this episode with all of you because the birth of her daughter Lois was my first birth as a professional birth photographer. I had attended several births as a doula before then but this was my first birth with my new camera and using a flash in the birth space.
When Lois was born I was in the middle of training to become a certified birth photographer and it was a good thing too because I was prepared. Kally gave birth in the middle of the night and the only other light available besides some small LED candles was her midwives flashlight.
I'm your host Angela. MyMaine Birth is a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state’s biggest hospitals to Birth Center Births, and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated. From the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn, we explore the journey of child birth in all of its beauty, intensity, and emotion. Whether you are a soon to be mom, a seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.
As part of my commitment to capturing these incredible moments, I am proud to offer my birth photography services to families throughout Maine. As an experienced doula and photographer I am dedicated to capturing the beauty and emotion of this special moment in your life. And I create a personalized and intimate photo album that you will treasure forever. For all of the information head over to mymainephoto.com and then fill out the contact form to schedule a call with me!
Thank you for tuning in, and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories! See you back here again next week!
Kally: 0:00
So the midwives were packing up and leaving and it was like perfect timing. It was so divine because it was like right as Iris was going to wake up for school and so she must have heard them like close the door. And then she woke up obviously not divine as mom got no sleep, but it was divine that she woke up, like it was like five or whatever, and she like came in right in and she really wanted a girl and it was a girl. And so we're like meet your sister. It was so cool, it was so great and, like you obviously are a great first photographer and postpartum all that Like you, I we have so many amazing photos like in our own bed. It was like heaven getting in our own bed, like oh, I was like and we have like a king size bed, so it was like all of us like snuggled up.
Angela: 0:47
It was nice. I'm Angela and you're listening to my Maine Birth a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated, from the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn. We explore the journey of childbirth in all of its beauty, intensity and emotion. Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you. As part of my commitment to capturing these incredible moments, I'm proud to offer my birth photography services to families throughout Maine. As an experienced photographer, I'm dedicated to capturing the beauty and emotion of this special moment in your life, and I create a personalized and intimate photo album that you will treasure forever. For all of the information, head over to mymainphotocom and fill out the contact form to schedule a call with me. Now sit back, relax and join me as you dive into the world of child birth in Maine and discover the joy, strength and love that is at the heart of every birth story. Welcome to episode 50 of the my Maine Birth podcast. I cannot believe we are already at episode 50. I just want to take a minute to say thank you to everyone that has shared their stories on the podcast it truly would not be possible without you and also to everyone that has supported the podcast or expressed kind words. I appreciate you all so much.
Angela: 2:38
So today's birth story guest is my good friend, callie. She shares about her experience birthing her oldest daughter, iris, in a hospital, and also about the home birth of her youngest daughter, lois. I have been photographing Callie and her family for a while now, and I am so excited to share this episode with all of you because the birth of her daughter, lois, was my first birth as a professional birth photographer. I had attended several births before that, but this was my first birth with my new camera and using flash in the birth space. When Lois was born, I was in the middle of training to become a certified birth photographer, and it was a good thing too, because I was prepared. Callie gave birth in the middle of the night, and the only other light available, besides some small LED candles, was her midwife's flashlight. Now let's get into it. Hi, callie, welcome to my Main Birth. How's it going? So, to start, will you share a little bit about you and your family.
Kally: 3:49
So I have a husband named Doug and two little girls, Iris and Lois. Iris is almost six and Lois is one 18 months. Oh, my goodness.
Angela: 4:00
Yeah, she's like 18 months right now, this month, huh, oh my goodness.
Kally: 4:04
Yeah, she's like 18 months right now, this month Yep Walking and she's speaking a few words now and, yeah, definitely like keeping up with big sis. We're from Nebraska Doug and I are, but both girls were born here in Maine and, yeah, we plan to move South soon, so we're just taking our roots with us wherever we go.
Angela: 4:30
So will you share about when you first found out you're pregnant with Iris and a little bit about your thoughts in choosing your care?
Kally: 4:41
Yeah, when I found out I was pregnant with Iris, I was really shocked. We were actually going to go to a concert and I was like Doug was like you need to take a test and so I did. It was like a dollar tree test, like the one dollar test, which is kind of hilarious because they work and it's two little lines. And I just remember I was being like a little nervous so I cried when I found out because we had miscarried before. Like when we lived in California, I had a miscarriage before Iris. So I just remember I kind of like called her in in a way. Well, we did, because I was reading like Ina May's book, like the or no, what's it? Spiritual midwifery or something like that. Yeah, anyway. So I feel like reading those books because I wanted to be a doula, I just was like totally calling in a baby, like I was like really manifesting that, even though I didn't like on a subconscious level, you know, I didn't really know. And then, yeah, when we were about to go to the concert, doug was like you need to take the test, so I did and it was positive. It was really crazy and he like totally knew before I did. But yeah, I feel like that the care. I really knew I wanted a midwife because I was like so into like the entrenches of spiritual midwifery and like learning about the farm and like just really honoring the woman in her sacred space and all of that when you're in labor and delivery. So we ended up going with back co-midwives, which they were amazing. You basically go and meet with the like first nurse and then you rotate like three or four midwives each time that you go and I really felt aligned there. I really liked everyone that I met and everyone was really gentle and, yeah, we ended up.
Kally: 6:42
I also really liked that they delivered at Mercy Four River. So we ended up doing like all of our classes there, like all of like the breastfeeding classes are like you know, like I also did the CPR class. I recommend that to like every first new mom or even, if you're not just to be up to date on that, that was really beneficial. And like the home safety class or something like that, that was good for Doug. I feel like like just getting them involved when you're pregnant is like good for the dads you know, like just to help them like know what's going on. Yeah, so I really like the Mercy Forever before I even like knew that we were for sure gonna go with Batco, because it's like a hotel basically for the birthing person. So, yeah, we, really we. Once we got to Batco, we knew that we just really wanted to stay there. And yeah, it was really we. We really didn't have any problems at all.
Angela: 7:38
Yeah, so how did your pregnancy go? Did you do any like and um? What did that kind of look like?
Kally: 7:48
so we did do like genetic testing. Actually, this kind of just brought it back to me. I remember that we didn't do like the nipt, like we didn't want to know the gender or anything like that. So we said no to all of that. But there was something.
Kally: 8:06
I got an ultrasound with Iris, like I think we wait longer than like back in back in Nebraska, where we're from, like you get an ultrasound really early and in a main you like wait to like 12 or 16 I don't know something weeks, right, anyway. Um, so when we did the first ultrasound she had a bright bowel, which was total hoax, like we were stressing for like until the next four weeks or something, because this ultrasound said that her bowel showed up so bright that like brighter it's if it's what it's, so white as bone, then it could be like a genetic issue. So we already knew we weren't going to like abort the baby, like we wanted her or him we didn't know at the time and so we were just like what kind of like answers was this? Like we're we don't want to know anything like above that, right, like we like leave there, like with this picture and anyway. So then the next ultrasound, it was fine, she was totally fine.
Kally: 9:01
So four weeks of stress, but this time around well, the second time around I it did kind of scare me to get an ultrasound, although we still did early. But yeah, I know we're still on iris. But I will say that like once you have that like kind of trauma with the ultrasound, you're like I don't ever want to do one again. But we did. We did end up doing one really early with aloes because iris said that was twins and I'm like ever want to do one again. But we did. We did end up doing one really early with Lois because Iris said that was twins and I'm like I want to know if we're having twins.
Angela: 9:30
So but yeah, so did you do, like the glucose test and the GBS um with her?
Kally: 9:41
yeah, we did do the. Yes, we did in like the strep b or whatever. We did all that. Yep, yeah, we did, and I feel like it was just kind of reassuring to know like like all that was fine because my mom did have like gestational diabetes with me or one of our siblings and so like just knowing like the little things I mean, and and we would have been fine either way, but I feel like it was definitely like as a first time mom with having the miscarriage, it was really like any reassurance was good for for all that. But the one thing I was going to say is that we did do that like non-stress test with Iris and that was like something that I was not really like expecting to have to do, like where they put that band on your belly and check to see your contractions. Like I already knew I was having contractions, so it was very interesting. I guess I didn't really study up on that test before.
Angela: 10:44
Yeah. So then, how did your labor start with her? And, yeah, tell me about your birth.
Kally: 10:51
Yeah, so she was technically one week past the due date. I remember on my due date Doug had like sent, he was working a lot, so he there was, like flowers delivered. I don't remember what I was doing Maybe like taking a shower or something and I heard someone knocking on the door and I'm like who's here? And it was like flowers left out there and I'm like crying, like oh, she's so late. But then she didn't come for another week, so she was like literally like one exact day or like whatever, like one week past due and in the middle of the night.
Kally: 11:27
Well, first of all, I tried everything. I stopped working like one month before, which was way too early in my opinion. Like I was like just walking the baby like out. I was like walking miles every day like waiting for her to come. So and we like to try pineapple and I ate dates which helps soften the cervix. I ate six dates for like a day, for like a solid month with both girls. I, yeah, I basically walked her out is what I say and this is TMI.
Kally: 11:56
But we had sex and I was like you need to just like make sure you keep it in there, basically like. So that worked like that night, like after, like whatever we probably had around the bedtime, and at 5 am I woke up like I think this is it. But mind you, I did lose like the mucus plug like a day or two before that, which is, like you know the show. So I did get like a little bit like on my wiping area, like. So I knew it was coming, but I just didn't know when. So, anyway, yeah, so we had sex and I said the semen worked because it really did. I was like 5 am, I started to have faint contractions and then 5, 21 am the next day. She was born October 6th. So that was really it. It was really quick. I mean 24 hours for a first time mom, I feel like it's pretty average.
Kally: 12:49
So it's actually kind of funny, because it was like Thursday I had the ultrasound scheduled, like the one that they want you to do when you're past your due date, and then from the ultrasound which I was having contraction, so like five in the morning I woke up and then I went to my like early afternoon, like 11 o'clock or something, appointment to the ultrasound. Everything was good, fluids were fine, yada, yada, and then it was like I had like a little lag time between that appointment and then like the actual like office appointment. So I remember I went to like the like the playground nearby and was like walking and like waddling basically and like having contractions and I'm like felt good, like I didn't like you know. And then we went to Bat Cove and that was when I did like that non-stress test and I said yes to a check and in my mind I didn't really want to, but I was like so ready, right, I was like so ready to know where I was at and that test, or I mean that check, was literally a game changer. Like she basically stripped my membranes. Looking in hindsight I didn't know at the time, like that's what it was. But so I left there from that appointment after doing like the stress test, she was like oh, you're having that baby tonight. I left there bleeding, having stronger contractions, like it was crazy, like I was.
Kally: 14:13
I was I said no checks the second time around. I was like no way, because of that check. Yeah, so then so after that appointment we went home. My mom was in town and it was pretty cool. I mean. I said I wanted no visitors at the hospital. So yeah, so my mom came to town so she was there and, um, like I was laboring at home as long as I could, we had like walked and basically like all the neighbors knew basically that I was in labor because of the way I was walking and stopping for contractions, and then I would, I we had like a chicken dinner, like a local chicken right down the road, um, and I was like sitting on the birthing ball eating dinner and like I remember I got in the bath kind of early, like early on, and like put like little rose flower petals, you know, like the whole shebang, but like I feel like it like maybe it was too early to take a bath, Like I was maybe too relaxed, and then finally things started to really heat up, like maybe around like nine, basically after dinner, and so I like just got into bed and like tried to rest Cause that's what they tell you to do, maybe I did like a phone call in between there just to tell him where I was at. And then I remember Doug was like I think you're gonna have this baby like in the car if we don't go soon.
Kally: 15:28
So around like 11 o'clock we checked in to Mercy and I remember she wanted to do a check. Jen, she was really sweet, she was like so supportive, she's like you could do anything for 60 seconds, it's like when it got really heated. But I remember she wanted to do a check and I was like, no, no checks. And then she was like, well, we really like to do them when you get to the hospital, like we want to know where you're at. And so finally I think I just said yes, maybe I don't even really know how they persuaded me, but I was definitely like no, no, no. And then she was like what did she do to you there? And I was like fine, whatever, like, just do it. And I was like seven centimeters, which is good to hear when you're like in it, right, you're like phew, I'm not too early, so that was cool.
Kally: 16:09
And then I had gotten the shower, doug like took a nap or whatever you want to say rested, and I just remember they were really respectful, like I was basically laboring by myself in the shower, like unlimited hot water was amazing, because, since we were at the hospital. And then I remember they were like do you want to get in the tub? And I was like, yes, that's like I wanted to birth Iris in the tub. Obviously I didn't know it was a girl at the time. And then I remember I was in there, I was bearing down, like howling like a lion I mean, you heard Lois, so you know I was pretty much like that with Iris and I remember they were like you want to turn the jets on? And I was like yes, this is before getting in actually.
Kally: 16:49
And then when I got in there I was like no jets, like I. You just never know, it's so sensitive like when I got in there I was like turn the jets off, and so then everyone left the room except for Doug who was like resting still, and then I was like bearing down, like howling like a lion, and then the nurse comes in and the next thing I know then the midwife is in, because clearly I was probably about to have a baby. And so then they kind of like asked me, like nudged me, to get out of the tub, and then I did and I got like onto the bed. I think I skipped where my water broke, but my water I remember like like I was like on the birthing ball, like in between the shower and the bathtub, and I heard a loud, loud pop and I was like, did you guys hear that? Like holy cow, what was that?
Angela: 17:34
and it was my water, but no one else had heard it.
Kally: 17:36
But it was like so loud to me and then they had seen that there was meconium in my water. So they're like just to let you know there's going to be more doctors or like people in the room after she's like the baby's here, and thankfully I just put that fly right over my head. I did not let that get to me at all, because that could have really made things go sour if I would have, like you know, thought about that and like they like say it's like a concern for like lungs and yada, yada. So thankfully I was already too far in it at that point. It just went right over my head. And so then I like fast forward back to after the tub they got.
Kally: 18:14
I got back to the like to the bed and I would like remember I was like on all fours and then I had a couple contractions and then I basically got on my back and they're like all right, you're to push, and Jen like put her fingers like where I should focus my energy to, and that really helped. I pushed like within 30 minutes or not. Even she was here and Doug was like it's a girl and yeah, like three minutes later they cut the cord and she was. She went right to my chest, it all great. It was like nothing really.
Kally: 18:45
You know, I remember I was shaking a lot after they don't really put that in the baby books like I was like I asked if I was having a seizure because I was like shaking, like like so bad. So that was really cool and I would definitely like tell some mamas that that happens now because I had no idea. Like you don't really hear about shaking after because of all the hormones and adrenaline. But yeah, so she was born at five in the morning, like 24 hours later, and it was a girl, was so cute. We named her Iris. That was like the one name we agreed on and so we should have known it was a girl.
Angela: 19:20
Oh my gosh. So how was your postpartum with her?
Kally: 19:26
um, yeah, I don't know, like day four I was back. I like went back to Mercy because they had, like that amazing lactation consultant there and like they do like free classes. I'm not sure if they still do that or not, but I really took advantage of that because, like that Elsie like was the person that did our classes and so I like already had known about it. She was like this fun poppy woman from boston like that comes up all the time and I just like really vibed with her. So I was like day four carrying the car seat, like I didn't really do like the whole 30 to 90 days postpartum, you know, like staying home and bed and rest. I didn't really do that. I definitely like got my act out and got back at it. But Doug also was at work and I mean I wasn't like you know, I didn't really mind, I was fine, I was ready to get back, I think, because I was by myself. We don't really have family here. You know, I didn't really have a meal train set up. We probably could have benefited from that like this time around. But yeah, so I went back to that lactation consultant like whatever walk-in thing that you could do, and I just remember like Iris was gaining and like most people that were there were not there for that reason, but she did have. I had oversupply. So like I remember like she really did have to like help me, like do like the laid back, like nursing where you like have to like slump, basically, and like hold your boob in their mouth. So, yeah, like I had fast letdown and oversupply, which obviously it like when it leveled out is what I'm trying to say and and I nursed her for like two and a half years. So keep at it right. Even if you have all the struggle at the beginning, it definitely it evens out and you learn that connection. So, yeah, postpartum was pretty good. I mean no complaints. I healed up very nicely. I had no tearing, no stitches. I mean I begged for one stitch but I didn't need it. Jen was like you're, you're out of your mind. Yeah, it was, it was good.
Kally: 21:29
I will say to add in there that Doug said, like before we had Iris, that he wanted to be waist up, like you know how some men are, like no way, like I don't want to see that, you know and like in it.
Kally: 21:42
He was like holding my leg up, like know and like in it he was like holding my leg up, like saying like all these nice things, like encouraging words, and like he cut the cord, like all these things that like when you're in it, like I feel, like all those things that you think and say are like out the window, like it's like your baby. So, and also the irises and lois's placentas were completely different. Like, iris's placenta was really bright, red and like not small, it was very like gushy, like huge, like thick, but like not the whole size of my stomach like, whereas lois's was like literally the entire, it was ginormous. It was like the width of my body. And I remember Iris's cord was really spirally and long and blue. It was really pretty and I just like didn't do anything with it oh yeah, you didn't, so you didn't save your placenta with her no, or like even I just have pictures, thankfully yeah, oh my gosh.
Angela: 22:42
I think that's so funny that Doug was saying that he wanted to be the waist up considering how things went with Lois.
Kally: 22:51
And also yeah, so men can really change when they like are in it. So that's really, oh my gosh, that's cool. So, yeah, you were so great. I was so happy to have you there, like with Lois. I know we haven't talked about that yet, but it was so good. I feel like everything was like perfect dream birth for sure yeah, it was a beautiful birth.
Angela: 23:14
I was prepared with my flash and I was so thankful because the only light in the room when you gave birth in the middle of the night was your midwife's flashlight.
Kally: 23:26
So exactly they did. I think we just had like those very like LED light, like candle things. There was like no way.
Angela: 23:35
They were so pretty, but yes, it was very dark.
Kally: 23:38
Yes, exactly yes, exactly.
Angela: 23:48
So now tell me a little bit about when you found out you were pregnant with Lois and a little bit about your thoughts and choosing your care the second time around so Lois was a honeymoon baby basically.
Kally: 23:58
Yeah so my app like we did like the fertility tracking, like I have the flow app, like totally privy to all the things, except I wasn't like taking my temperature every morning like the basal body temperature, but yeah so it was just definitely like a honeymoon baby, like she was, she was our souvenir, but yeah. So I mean, we knew that we wanted to do a midwife again and I really wanted. I think I might even started at Batco like for like the first initial one and I was like no, like I want to do a home birth. I think that's how it started. So I think I went there to like get the comfort. Yeah, I think I got the confirmation from that co like I am actually indeed pregnant.
Kally: 24:44
And I did the um first ultrasound I talked about earlier. Like that Cause Iris was like it's a boy and a girl, it's a boy and a girl and I'm like holy cow, like I just want to know if I'm having twins, like I need to know, and so we did it really early, like super early, and then after that I was just like I really felt called to do a home birth. Like nothing wrong with, like nothing really too crazy happened. You know, like with that co. I will say that there was like some things like after, like in the hospital setting that I wasn't like in love with. That made me kind of choose a home birth. But also I remember I met or learned that Sakape Brenda she's amazing, she gave birth on the farm, like in a maze farm in Tennessee or whatever, and I'm like I have to have her as my midwife. So I was like totally hands down, like wanted her to be my midwife and have you ever been there to like their spot to?
Kally: 25:47
Sakape yes, it's beautiful right on the river and yeah, yeah, and she's so like caring and magical and like during all the shenanigans she like set up her own little like area for like the moms and but it was so funny because they like had all this protocol of like still masking and stuff, but yet there's like an outhouse to go potty Like I'm like what I know. It was like backwoods-y but like still like westernized, I don't know. It was kind of funny. But besides that, like they did really well with Iris, because I was not going to like not involve her, so like they like did everything you know pretty good. And then that's like I really liked going there. I like loved brenda to death. And yeah, I feel like I just in the middle of it, like in the not I don't even know, do you remember how far along I was? I like have to remember I think I was like how far along I was. I like have to remember I think I was like it was near Christmas or something, but it was like I got COVID and that's where I didn't like their protocols. So I was like out of there, like I knew right away I was not, I'm not. I was like we're not aligned anymore, but I mean, I feel like that's just kind of how COVID played it out, no matter, like if it was in that type of setting, or your friends or your family, like you, kind of had that line and I just really stuck to that intuition. I was like I'm not feeling aligned. They're not.
Kally: 27:13
Like I think what happened was I got COVID and they like wanted me to test, to even come there, and I'm like it's already been, I've quarantined for 14 days. It was like before one quarantine time was still long because Iris like I didn't want to send her to school you know what I mean like we had just stayed home to be safe. And then I'm like wait, I don't want to even test, like I don't need to, like I've, I've done the rule. And then after that it was just like little things kept adding up that they wanted what they wanted and not what mom wanted, and I'm like I was just done. And so that's when I started to look to other places and I chose a different midwife and at that point I was like I got this by myself, kind of, but like we need the midwife to, like for reassurance purposes. So yeah, when we made the switch, I was just like stoked to have like that power back.
Kally: 28:05
Basically that I knew like I wasn't going to be like questioned, because you never know if you're being questioned when you're not in labor. Like it's gonna happen when you are in labor. Like what if that situation? I don't know, I don't even want to know like what if it, because you just know, like like you don't question a birthing person or a pregnant woman, cause then you would question the birthing person, so yeah, but fast forward to like the next midwife. Everything was great, I mean very gentle. I didn't have, like you know, much time, so I feel like we kind of paid an extra fee because of that. But I mean Doug was down, he was like, if you, you're saying we're doing it because I was there was no, there was no, not not happening.
Angela: 28:54
Exactly yeah, and you had also, at that point, had friends that had had a free birth right Like had friends that had had a free birth right, like, did that happen yet?
Kally: 29:07
at that point? Not yet, nope, but she, she, um, my girlfriend is a doula and she worked in the hospital setting and yeah, she kind of was like encouraging me to go with my instincts, which I feel like also yeah, that was probably why I was so gung-ho also like she probably not persuaded me. I already knew I wanted to switch at that point. But she was like, yeah, we'll follow it. And I'm like, yeah, I'm following it. And then I was like wrote an email, like all right, this is it, I'm not coming. I think I did actually finish. I did go back, but I wanted to go back to this like give piece, because I loved Brenda, like I literally did, like she was so nice and I know like a lot like my older friends had, she had helped with their babies, but yeah, so yeah, that was basically my girlfriend did. She did probably just like encourage me to stick to my guts, so that was good, but she had her baby one month before Lois, so not yet okay, so now, what like testing did you do?
Angela: 30:06
and did you do anything like? Did you do like the gps with your new um midwife after you switched?
Kally: 30:12
you know, I like trying to remember. I know that we didn't do much. I think that I did do the diabetes with Sakape, I believe because I only like did, like the natural. I didn't even drink that nasty drink, I just like did a bunch of like breakfasty, sugary, like sweet stuff. I don't know why they didn't do that the first time at Batco, because I'm sure I could have had that option. But yeah, that was nice. I didn't have to drink like that nasty orange drink. I just like ate lots of syrup, which I feel like is also better for your body, but then like an orange Kool-Aid or whatever that other stuff was. But and then with the GBS, I don't think I did anything. With Lois I might have done like. No, I don't think I did any genetic anything because at this time I was like we're having a baby, so no, I think I just said no to everything, basically.
Angela: 31:08
So now can you walk me through the final weeks and days of your pregnancy and then share about your labor and birth?
Kally: 31:18
So when I switched midwives, I told her about my due date being a little off because I was like following what I had on the app but basically it didn't make sense because we didn't have sex. So like it was like we knew when she was conceived, basically on the honeymoon, and then we like went out of town and then whatever happened when we got back, like whatever we were like we knew. So I like told her and we adjusted the due date. So then that put me back or whatever put me forward, I guess I should say, to have a different due date, which was good because I was feeling a little nervous. The timeline at the end, like the last couple weeks, I think I was basically 43 weeks and they wanted to do that like ultrasound and if you don't have enough fluids they could like kind of have you be induced or like you know. All of those things started to come. So I was just like doing all this like hypnobirthing stuff my friend had sent me. I was doing like fear release meditations and just like walking and doing like walking, like on this, like this side or whatever, curb walking and like rock walking. I was doing all of those and like lunging, like all those things are really good and yeah, I just feel like I was getting a little pressured to get the baby out. So I was doing everything that I did the first time, like pineapple and semen, like all those things, and I like wasn't happening as much. So I just kind of tuned into like the meditation point and was like just talking to her, which I didn't know at the time either. We waited for both, which is really it was nice.
Kally: 33:02
So, yeah, the last weeks we just kind of hung out around the home a little bit and I mean I kept Iris going to school. Basically everything was kind of normal besides like work, life, we. It was like kind of like crazy. So I feel like she was holding on until it was like kind of mellowed out, like she knew what was going going on because, like mom's probably like walking situation, I don't know. But yeah, and I remember I didn't have like any like brackets and hicks with either girls.
Kally: 33:30
Like some people talk about those and then like actually asked about the last week and so we had like a mini flood in our basement and so I was like picking up this really wet, heavy rug and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm having Braxton Hicks. But it only happened like once or twice and it was because of heavy lifting, not because it was like Braxton Hicks, but so I thought she was going to come like, and then I think that got me like a little like. That was like I was like okay, just need to let it go, because it was like not going to happen if I was stressed out. So yeah, it was really amazing, like how it all started and obviously you are there to like talk with and stuff.
Kally: 34:12
It wasn't like your. I feel like your presence and like just like knowing like you're like I'm going to come when you want me to, like I just live a little bit further away, so like let me know, and I was just like so ready, I'm like just come, like obviously not that week before, but like at the time I was like just like come, so maybe we'll come, yeah.
Angela: 34:31
Yeah. So yeah, when I got there you were it's kind of like the afternoon, I think. You were like you were out on the street when I pulled up, like walking down the street.
Kally: 34:39
Yeah, I was like walking the road. Clearly I was walking so much but I mean I did all both girls. I feel like I just I can't sit still, like when I'm like in that like I I can sit still. But then I like want to like walk like.
Angela: 34:51
I just like to walk like you were in the zone when I got there. For sure you were. You were tuning into all of the things that was happening inside of your body.
Kally: 35:01
Yeah. And so I remember that maybe right before I went on that walk, iris, doug and I, we were like playing tennis outside and like in our driveway, which is like now when I think about it, I'm like, oh my gosh, that was like our last tennis before the baby, you know. I know it's like kind of sentimental. I'm like we were just like playing and Doug was like, wow, that was like kind of close together, like that contraction Cause I would be like, oh, you know. And then I remember, basically you went and got like that really elaborate meal from Tuscan Bistro or whatever. It was so good, I ate, like salmon and quinoa and so many good things that ended up coming up later in transition, but it was really nice to have that comforting meal in me because it gave me a lot of energy, for sure.
Kally: 35:51
And then I remember, maybe during that time was Iris awake? Yeah, I think so. But so then during the evening we ate dinner and then I got in the tub with Iris, like we've always taken a bath together at night and so like even today. But so like we have a big tub, but so, um, I put her to like I remember in like being in the tub and she'd be like, is that another one of those contractions? Because I'd be like, let's just not talk during the contraction, like we can play in between, but like when the contraction comes, just like, let mom hone in. And she'd be like, is that another contraction? I'm like, uh, yes, anyway. But so then when she went to bed, things really started to pick up.
Kally: 36:32
Yeah, they were really picking up at that point yeah, I love that you were there for it, but yeah. So then we like read our books and got her to bed and then things really picked up and I just remember like doing the rebozo and like I don't even know, just like honing in. I think I might've even done that release meditation again or like another like hypnobirthing thing. So I feel like Doug really wanted to check in with a midwife. I feel like the man kind of needs like like we probably could have done a free birth, but how much Doug was like so supportive, but like it's good for him to have like like that reassurance, how we were talking about earlier. But or just like someone to be like okay, you're actually in charge, even though I'm in charge and she's really in charge, but you're kind of in charge, you know like that's kind of how it goes and so yeah. So I feel like she was like I, yeah. So the midwife was like how about you? You I remember I was tired. Doug was like why don't you call? So then we did and checked in and she's like oh well, if you're tired, then why don't you try to lay down in bed? And so I did and I remember a few contractions went by and I was like I was for sure. I was like I'm going to sleep, this baby's not coming, because in my mind I'm like she's not coming till 5am cause that's what happened with Iris. But no birth is the same as the last one, where I'm sure of it. And so then she was like I'm actually coming and I'm like you're what? And I was like there's no way. And she's like, yeah, I think I'm actually going to come. It will be a little bit, but I'm going to come. And I was like you're what? She's like, yeah, you're going to have this baby soon. And I was like I am Like I thought I was going to go to bed. She's like you're not going to be getting any sleep, like your contractions are coming pretty strong. Like you just moaned like two times in like a minute, turned on Kanye and I'm like swinging from the rebozo, like it was no longer quiet. It was like pump it up and get this baby out. And then I remember I like put my foot up, like on that foot, rest a couple of times to like do the lunging, and that was like really getting her working, like working down the canal, yeah. And so then the midwives show up and I think like we still had like some poppier music on, maybe not, because I remember like when Lois was born we actually had like the Tom Coyar, like the whole, like straight up, like what I would have wanted. I don't even know how Doug switched it, but it did, and so, um, I remember like the midwife getting there and it wasn't really disruptive and like you, weren't really disruptive at all.
Kally: 39:01
But in the middle, I think, after transition, like I like I actually threw up this time and I didn't. I remember that I was like I think I'm gonna throw up and so they like had me sniff peppermint on a cotton ball, like the essential oil, and that I immediately threw up. I was like I think this scents are so strong to me, like I just was like that, was it? So then I was like I didn't throw up with Iris, so I was like a little concerned.
Kally: 39:25
I'm like am I sick? Like am I okay? And they're like that's normal, and I, in hindsight I remember reading all about that, but in the moment I was like what's wrong with me? And so that was when then you guys both like maybe you took a couple of pictures and then you like left the room, like they were like we're gonna go do some charting, like they knew I was in transition or whatever. And then I remember I was like that, like next time I put my foot up on the footstool, like within minutes I called, we were calling the midwife back in. I like felt a little watched or something at that point, because maybe they were like getting set up and like I didn't feel like it was like a negative thing. I just felt like I wasn't like back in that like center zone right and then, like before it was quiet, just the two of you.
Angela: 40:10
And, yeah, as soon as we walked out, it was just the two of you again.
Kally: 40:13
You got right back into it yeah, I was like okay, I was like I have to poop or something. And Doug's like oh snap. And so he like threw a chucks pad underneath me. And I don't even think it was poop, I think it was blood like. I think it was like time. And so then the midwife was like I was like I really need to poop, like take me to the bathroom. But I was like I did. I remember I would like throw my body at this point to the ground, like I was like still like just I wanted to be on the ground during the contraction. And so then they got me to like the bathroom and the midwife was so gently, like would you like to have the baby in the toilet or in the tub? And so then Doug hopped right in and I'm like like yeah, he literally like I did not see that coming.
Angela: 40:57
Oh, you got in. First you were kind of like getting in and then, yeah, like out of the tub he's like hopped right in with you.
Kally: 41:03
It was so, so awesome for some reason my memory was he got in first, but that probably makes sense, maybe because he was so willing to get in, it was like.
Angela: 41:11
But anyway, so our tub was did you guys plan that ahead of?
Kally: 41:14
time. No, no, no, not at all, that's what I mean. He probably like had that waist up, no, but anyway. So then I was in the tub and our tub was narrow, though right and like also with another main in there, I didn't have like that space to like really like if it was a circular pool, like to like open up. So I think I was kind of like also Lois had a ginormous head, like bigger than her body. I remember they're like commenting on that, but so it was like very big and I remember that was like that was her body. I remember they're like commenting on that, but so it was like very big and I remember that was like. That was like hard.
Kally: 41:45
I was like looking at the midwife, like help me, because I was like pushing and I felt like I was doing nothing. But yeah, I think I still only pushed for like 20 minutes, like it was very, very short, but in the moment it was like ring of fire. Yeah, it was so amazing. And then I remember like the like midwife was like, um, now we're gonna put the baby because Doug caught her Lois, and like was like holding her hand and you got all those beautiful pictures. Yeah, like, I remember that for sure also, I think like having the pictures, I like remember like how it was like in between, that like space in between, like with Iris. I remember this is like going back, but I remember like how it was like in between, that like space in between, like with iris. I remember this is like going back, but I remember like looking, he was more so holding up my leg and I was like on my back and so I could see her bright, bright blue eyes. Like actually they ended up turning brown, but I remember like they were like crystal blue and I was like in that, like that was like god's space or whatever, like that was like ethereal, like out of my body. And with lois, I remember like doug was like holding her hand, like her head, and so like I could see that yeah, it was really cool.
Kally: 42:49
But and then he like basically was like crying and like how picked, like got her, and then the midwife was like I'm gonna put the baby on the mom. It's like she just did all this work. So yeah, and then I remember just like I feel like we like always wait for that cry because we're like in, in, like the western eyes, like in the movies and stuff, you like hear the baby cry immediately. But like I didn't feel like panicky. But at first I was like looking around, like why isn't she crying? Because like no one cared. But I like to me I was like is she okay? And then she was fine. But and like she looked fine, like I didn to me. I was like is she okay? And then she was fine. But and like she looked fine. Like I didn't ever, like I don't think I doubted it, but I just like prayed, like please, god, let her cry, I'd be fine, and then she cried. You know all as well, you remember that it was like a pause kind of.
Angela: 43:33
There was a pause for sure, but she did cry like soon after.
Kally: 43:37
I was sort of like holding my breath also at that moment, Like okay, yeah, I think like yeah, I don't know, like we just like held like the space, right, but like I think it was also just because that's just like what. It was so calm, like she came into a calm water environment, like no, it was like her dad or her mom. Like it wasn't like some blue gloves and like crazy white lights, it was like dark.
Angela: 44:07
I gloves and like crazy white lights. It was like dark, I don't know. I feel like it was just like the calm atmosphere. Yeah, the gloves didn't really touch her. She just your midwife kind of like dug, grabbed her and then your midwife like gently put her hands on his hands and was like we're going this way.
Kally: 44:12
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, and so like compared to like another setting, yeah, yeah, so it was all great. And then we waited. Though that was one thing I forgot to mention with Iris is like the postpartum. Like they definitely pressed on my stomach so many times and I did not even want them to do that anymore because I bled a lot and like they wanted like the bleeding and they like cut the cord kind of early with her and honestly, like this time around I remember like in my birth vision I was like I want to talk about the placenta because of that, and so this time we waited so long, like we waited like until it was like white, basically like we waited forever until. And then I just remember like plopped right out, like I didn't have anyone tugging on it or pulling it to like make me rush my placenta out, and I just like kind of stood up and it fell out. I'm like what the heck? And it was huge, it was enormous yeah, it was like half an hour.
Kally: 45:12
Yeah, yeah, it was a long time. I was like I was surprised, like I mean, because maybe I don't know, like now it's not even normal to like wait that long, but it is so normal. It was like I just like waited in the water and Doug like took a shower and like it was totally normal, like everything was fine, nothing was sketchy, nothing was like rushed around and yeah, I just like held her and I remember she latched like she was hungry, like she had those little like mark like blisters on her hands, on both of them from like sucking in in the belly. So she came out and like my confidence for nursing was right back where it was with because she like latched right on like suckling holy cow. So it was literally a dream birth and you were definitely a part of it. So I'm so happy. I think you like made me like eventually I got, we got out and you like made me bread and peanut butter. I don't remember something like that, right.
Angela: 46:07
Yeah, it made you like a little bedside snack, like catty, and like I had all my bars.
Kally: 46:13
And then you were also so helpful postpartum, like with Iris, yeah, but I guess we kind of missed like so the midwives were packing up and leaving and it was like perfect timing. It was so divine because it was like right as Iris was going to wake up for school and so she must have heard them like close the door. And then she woke up Obviously not divine as mom got no sleep, but it was divine that she woke up, like it was like five or whatever, and she like came in right in. She really wanted a girl and it was a girl.
Kally: 46:45
And so we're like meet your sister, lois, it was so cool, it was so great. And like you obviously are a great first photographer and postpartum all that, like you we have so many amazing photos like in our own bed. It was like heaven getting in our own bed, like oh, I was like and we have like a king size bed, so it was like all of us like snuggled up, it was nice, and like I also remember that our midwife was like this is before Iris woke up, but she was like the dad always holds the baby and like in, like the home birth ones, like you see the dad holding up and he was like why are you waking me up and why?
Angela: 47:23
are you? Yeah, doug immediately fell asleep, so like after you had the baby, like you got into bed and he's like, okay, you're good, you're all set, and like he passed right out, yeah, you have to wake up.
Kally: 47:36
Yeah, and he was like why are you waking me up and why are you still here? I'm like, oh god, sorry. He said that.
Kally: 47:43
It was kind of hilarious yeah so then he ended up holding it right. Yeah, he like stood up and held it, then he went right back to bed, but I mean, he did so much help and work, so it was amazing. Yeah, it was, and I'm so glad that you were a part of it. Seriously, it was so great and we're so grateful to have all the pictures and all of your support. It was literally amazing. Like I will always remember that I, we, we plan to have more babies and I'm like a little sad that you're going to have to like fly to Georgia or something.
Angela: 48:17
Oh my gosh. Well, keep me in the loop. You never know.
Kally: 48:21
Oh yeah, thanks for doing this. It really is good to like get it out too.
Angela: 48:26
Like I don't, you know, I never really planned to like rehash it out, so yeah, oh my gosh, I thought for sure that you guys had talked about how like he was going to get in the tub with you ahead of time, the way that it all kind of played out. I think it's so funny that you know how like the dads really can like, transform and like the more they like learn about birth and like even just in the actual experience, like thinking about it ahead of time. You might think, oh, I don't, you know, want to do any of these things, but you're like in the moment, just acting, and you know intuitively like they're, you're like following your intuition, but you know the dads are also like following their intuitions too, and it's so cool.
Kally: 49:09
It is. Yeah, I remember like we talked about like how I wanted him to catch the bait, like I didn't want, like how Jen kind of helped Iris, like come out, like I didn't want, because if you like look it up, you like learn about like who touches your baby first, like all these different things. So I was like I want you or me, like one of us, obviously like if it was you it's better than like loves. But like I was like whoever touches the baby first is like a good like that's like what you want to like kind of remember and hone in if you're going to have your dream birth. So we literally like checked all the boxes of what we wanted for dream birth and it was amazing, amazing for sure. And you're right, like dads definitely have intuition and follow their instincts in birth for sure, and are a big helping hand or not I feel. But yeah, most times it's like you can free birth or do whatever you want. It's your birth and so like having that support is definitely a key component.
Angela: 50:06
Yeah, absolutely so. Now one more question If you were to give advice to an expecting mama, or even like new parents, what would be the biggest thing that you would say to them?
Kally: 50:21
really follow that intuition and do your own homework. Obviously, everyone else can give you their input and if you find the right provider, you will know and you'll really feel aligned with that. And if you're ever feeling doubt, change your provider. Like I feel like I really honed into that. This last one, like who knows what, could I could have been not having a dream birth, you know what I mean. So I feel like just really advocating for yourself because if they're not aligned with you during your pregnancy, then when you're in that very vulnerable state, you really never know what's going to go on. So, yeah, and always just, you know, kind of roll with it. Right, like you never really know, you never really know what's going to go on. But yeah, I would say, advocate and roll with it. Yeah, absolutely. So now will you share a little bit, learn more.
Kally: 51:35
My IG handle is livingwatermama and yeah, I drink kangen water throughout all of my pregnancy and postpartum and just staying hydrated on like cellular level really helps with all things to be healthy and have energy to keep up with like a toddler and grow human, human. But yeah, just like, even postpartum, like having like in, like when, now that she's growing up, like having those natural cleaners and like basically what it is? Is it's an ionizer that transforms your tap water into different ph's, seven different levels of ph, and you can have drinking water, a cleaning water, a beauty water and you just having all these different uses in one device. Is it's a game changer? I spray a product or, sorry, it's a water.
Kally: 52:31
I spray a water on the high chairs and on their hands. That's as strong as bleach but it's as sensitive to you know, on their hands. That's as strong as bleach but it's as sensitive to put on their little baby hands. So just having this like one thing, I say it's a game changer for parents and moms and to really look into like the health benefits of drinking alkaline water and providing your kids with like that for their gut health, just really and providing your kids with like that for their gut health, just really really tuning into that. And yeah, now I've started to share it. So my name, like I said, is Living Water Mama. If you want any more information or any of the research, I have a lot of it.
Angela: 53:09
Yeah, my eyes were really opened to that water when I was in your home, like during the time of like your birth and then postpartum. I started to drink it and I was like, oh my gosh, like this like is literally like life water. Like I felt differently during that, like I'm not like the life water, like the brand life water is, like real life water gives you is what I felt like when I was drinking it. And now I'm like really yeah, I'm like really obsessed and I really want to get one soon.
Kally: 53:42
I'm excited. Yeah, well, when the time is right, I look forward to helping you with it. But, yes, it's, it's definitely been like a new way of life, right, it's like your everyday, like you're going back to this one machine. It's kind of like what other kitchen appliance do you go back to all the time, like a refrigerator, right, but this is more like so versatile, it has like a hundred different uses. So, yeah, I feel like if you, if you're calling it, in one day you'll have it girl yeah, I totally am.
Angela: 54:13
Well, I will link all of your information in the show notes so people can find you if they're interested in that. And thank you so much, callie, for sharing your stories today.
Kally: 54:23
Yes, thank you for having me and I look forward to seeing you again soon.
Angela: 54:31
And that's the end of another episode of the my Main Birth podcast. Thank you for joining me and listening. I hope that the stories shared here have been inspiring and informative to all of my listeners. If you're looking to capture your own birth story, I highly recommend considering my birth photography services. I'm a professional photographer and I'm very passionate about capturing the raw and emotional moments of the birthing process, and I designed a personalized and intimate photo album, creating a beautiful and lasting memory of one of the most special moments of your life. For more information, head over to mymainphotocom and schedule a call with me. Thanks again for tuning in and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories. Don't forget to subscribe and leave me a review, and I'll see you back here again next week.