48. MyMaine Birth: Katie Shares her Maine Free Birth Story

Today's birth story guest is Katie Stroud, she is a Radical Birth Keeper and mother of two and she shares about her EMMC hospital birth story followed by the story of her wild pregnancy and beautiful Maine free birth.    You can find her on Instagram at @instinctively_womban  

Welcome to MyMaine Birth, a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine.  From our state’s biggest hospitals to Birth Center Births, and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated.  From the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn, we explore the journey of child birth in all of its beauty, intensity, and emotion. Whether you are a soon to be mom, a seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.  

As part of my commitment to capturing these incredible moments, I am proud to offer my birth photography services to families throughout Maine.  As an experienced doula and  photographer I am dedicated to capturing the beauty and emotion of this special moment in your life.  And I create a personalized and intimate photo album that you will treasure forever.  For all of the information head over to mymainebirth.com

If you have been on the fence about hiring a birth photographer I want to encourage you to reach out to me, I currently have one opening for November and one opening for December and of course I am booking into next year.  You can head over to my website for all of the information  https://www.mymainebirth.com Or you can shoot me a message over on Instagram @MyMaineBirth

Thank you for tuning in, and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories!  I will see you back here again next week! 

Transcript

Katie: 0:00

I just laid on my bed and like I would lay down and rest. And then when I felt, when I felt a sensation coming, I would just get on my hands and knees and rock and remember the affirmations and just like try to feel into every sensation more and like somehow turn any sensation of pain into pleasure or or not pleasure, but like just just a, just a feeling instead of a painful feeling. And they, they weren't super intense. Still, this was a. So I started we bring about 10 30 in my room by 1130. I started feeling like the baby was coming down my birth canal, Like he was in there locked and loaded, and I knew it and I could feel it. And so I yelled to my husband like, okay, get the bath going, cause I'm ready, I want to get in there. And so he starts it and I yeah, like I, it's so crazy. I just I was just so in my body and like not overthinking anything, not like not worrying and and just listening and whatever my body was telling me. I was just doing.

Angela: 1:11

I'm Angela and you're listening to my Maine Birth a space where we share the real life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine. From our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births, every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated, from the first feelings of pregnancy to the first cry of your newborn, we explore the journey of childbirth in all of its beauty, intensity and emotion. Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you. As part of my commitment to capturing these incredible moments, I'm proud to offer my birth photography services to families throughout Maine. As an experienced photographer, I'm dedicated to capturing the beauty and emotion of this special moment in your life.

Angela: 2:05

If you are currently expecting and have been on the fence about hiring a birth photographer, I want to encourage you to reach out to me. I have one spot open for November and one spot open for December, and I am currently booking into next year, so shoot me a message over on Instagram I'm at MyMainBirth or you can head over to my website, mymainphotocom, for all of the information. And this is definitely an episode that you're not going to want to miss Today's birth story. Guest is Katie, and she shares about her Eastern Maine Medical Center hospital experience, followed by her wild pregnancy and free birth story. Hi Katie, welcome to my Maine Birth.

Katie: 2:53

Hi there. So, to get started, will you share a little bit about you and your family? Yeah, so my family and I we live in rural Maine. Pretty much like all of Maine is rural. We're in the Door Foxcroft area. We've moved around a little bit throughout Maine before we had kids, but we settled in this area. We bought our first home.

Katie: 3:16

We have two boys, leo's two and a half and Axel is four months old, and my husband, ryan, was a nurse. I came from healthcare. I used to be an x-ray tech, so we both came from the healthcare world, left there shortly after the COVID nonsense stuff. So we're just kind of living life right now, figuring things out. I started cleaning houses for work and and it's you know paid our bills, and then my husband coaches private football. He he's doing that more on the side Now he has a different job. But yeah, we're really really happy about our decisions and we feel strongly about things and we're we want to show our children you know that it's important to stay true to your values and and, yeah, and don't give in to stuff that you don't believe in.

Angela: 4:09

So yeah, yeah, so true and important, absolutely.

Katie: 4:15

Yeah.

Angela: 4:16

So to get started with your birth stories, will you share when you first found out you were pregnant and a little bit about your thoughts in choosing your care?

Katie: 4:25

Yeah, so with my first son, Theo, we were still in the medical system at that point. I was still in a different spot in my life than where I'm at now. I was more on the natural, the natural living road, you know, like less toxins but still not like fully like. I was still, like you know, using candles in my home and like little things like that, you know. But so, anyway, I never questioned like how I was going to move forward with that pregnancy. It was always like I'm gonna find an OB and go from there and and I always knew that I wanted to have like a very natural, natural birth, as much as it can be in the hospital. But so I went into it knowing like I'm just going to go with an OB, I'm going to birth in the hospital, I'm going to have a really great birthing plan and they're going to follow it and it's going to be all good and I'm not going to, you know, be pressured into things. And, and I had a lot of trust in my body right from the beginning, I never doubted my ability to birth children.

Katie: 5:27

Um, I think my mom kind of set that tone or from an early age, she always had nothing negative to say about children. You know, bearing children and I come from a family of three girls, so every time we would ask her, like mom, you know, did having kids hurt? And she would always say, no, not really Like, and she would say, like you just kind of forget and you do it again. And so I never had that fear and her pregnancies were always, you know, not complicated. She had mostly natural births. She had, you know, antibiotics and like Pitocin probably here and there, but she never had like pain medication. So so, yeah, I always had a really positive mindset about birth and I pretty much dove right into like listening to birth podcasts. I drove a lot for work. I had to drive an hour away pretty much every day, so I had a lot of time and so I got to listen to a lot of birth podcasts, mostly just like the natural birth podcast. I listened to Birth Hour a little bit, I can't remember what other ones, but yeah, so that kind of like prepared me and I feel like stories have always been medicine for me, especially when it comes to birth. So right from the beginning, those were super helpful. And, yeah, and I just went along my pregnancy continuing to get OB care. The place where I was going also had midwives there, which I thought was like a really great bonus because I thought midwives were, you know, would be a better fit for me than an OB, especially with my natural mindset.

Katie: 6:59

Everything was good in my pregnancy. I felt good. I never had any nausea or anything, which was funny because I remember in the beginning, like I was waiting to wake up and like feel that like nausea and almost like to to feel like, oh, I'm pregnant, you know, like to help set that in my head. But I never had that, which I'm thankful for now, Cause of my second one. I did so.

Katie: 7:22

I continued to work. I worked, you know, five days a week at the hospital, still Started to get kind of hard through COVID because we were having to wear masks and being pregnant already you get winded more easily and wearing a mask it was just terrible. It was not great, but I did what I had to do. And when I was about 36 weeks, I remember going and getting an ultrasound and there was like sort of like a scare for me and the ultrasound tech was kind of like questioning whether, like she was seeing a bleed on my skin and it was kind of a scary thing. Long story short, there was nothing wrong. It was just one of those. You know ultrasounds, the more you get, the more you're going to find that's not there. And it's funny too, because I worked in the x-ray department. So I was actually getting like extra ultrasounds like for fun and like knowing what I know now about the harms of ultrasounds. I'm like I thank God that my son is like fine and you know, normal when everything's great. But I got, I was getting like sometimes one or two a week, just like randomly, while I was at work. The ultrasound text would be like hey, like do you want to just like check on baby? And I'd be like, yeah, of course I want to see what he's doing in there. And you know it's fine, it is what it is now. But it's funny now where I'm at.

Katie: 8:42

So, yes, my due date came.

Katie: 8:45

It was on a Saturday and so I had worked that week and it was it was Friday evening and I was at work and I remember feeling like different that day.

Katie: 8:55

I just like the only way I can describe it and I tell people is I felt like poopy, like not like I had to poop, but just poopy, like my bowels were heavy, my like there was a lot of pressure down there, and so that's the only way I could describe it. And I started feeling that on Thursday sort of. And then Friday came and I felt like I had maybe been having, you know, some contractions throughout the day, but like nothing, nothing. I was like timing. I just was kind of aware of it and I didn't tell my husband because I didn't want him to get like all worked up and and in my head too, I was thinking like labor can last a long time for women, especially first time moms. So I'm not going to overthink it, I'm going to go into it and just let it be what it's going to be. I think that set me up really well in the end.

Katie: 9:50

So I got home I tell my husband like, hey, I think I'm having, I've been having contractions today, and he gets all excited. He's like, all right, when are we going to go? I'm like, no, no, we're not, we're not going anywhere. Yet. You know, you got to chill Like this could be a while and I put it on three crock pots of bone broth that I had been wanting to prep for postpartum. So I got that on and we just went about our night. We had dinner together, we ended up having sex one last time too, and I was hoping that would kind of like get things going more. And yeah, we just kind of relaxed at home and it did pick up. It was a really beautiful progression. Just like nothing like I couldn't handle. It was super easeful, like, and it was really cool to just be able to like feel, feel all of the sensations and just kind of let my body move. And it was so peaceful at home, like in my head. I'm like why did I even go anywhere? Like I was perfectly fine at home, it you know. And then then I had to leave to drive an hour to the hospital where I was birthing, so about 1030, um, we decided like I was timing my contractions, and they were like four or five minutes apart. And but the thing that was weird to me was that, like everybody says, like when they're that close, like it shouldn't be like really painful, you know, like so intense that you can't even handle it. But it wasn't for me. I was having conversations like I was handling everything well, and that's just how my body does it, I guess. So we decided to drive in around 1030. We get there. The car ride really wasn't bad, nothing picked up, my body actually kind of slowed down a little bit, which was really nice. And then we get there and of course I'm offered a wheelchair. Like 12 times I'm like no, I'm good, I want to walk, let me just walk. And I, 12 times I'm like no, oh, I'm good, I want to walk, let me just walk. And I get there and get checked in, and I remember, like not wanting to know how far dilated I was, so like I wanted I was going to be checked, because I thought that I had to be in whatever. So they checked and I told her like don't tell me, and the nurse tells me. But because I was eight centimeters, she thought like, oh, this is actually like really exciting, you know. So she, she said, you know, congrats, mama, you're eight centimeters. And I wasn't like mad about it at the time. It's kind of just like one of those things. It's like, you know, you ask somebody not to do something and they do it, but whatever. So I was eight centimeters. That was exciting.

Katie: 12:00

This was at like midnight, everything's picked up for sure. The intensity was where I would have expected for, you know, childbirth, and I wonder now if it's because of the environment or whatever, but I it did like, because I was at eight centimeters, I thought that it should be pretty quick from there, which it was. I ended up having him three hours later, three hours and 20 minutes later. So it wasn't that bad, but it was. I felt like there was a point where I was kind of like stuck and I don't know if it was because I was scared about the pain of, you know, him actually coming through my vagina, but I I was, I wasn't letting go. Eventually I did.

Katie: 12:42

The midwife who was on that night. She was saying that she was excited to be more hands-on with me because everybody always gets epidurals. So she was excited that I was not having that and she could use her skills more as a midwife. She didn't really do much to help me, but it was really peaceful at times. It was just me and my husband in there. They did leave us alone for a lot of it, which was nice, but of course I'm like hooked up to the monitor the belly strap thing and they just had to keep like rearranging it so they could get a better, you know, signal for his heart rate.

Katie: 13:15

Yeah, so it came a time where she had asked you know, do you want your water broken? Because it seems like that was a long time. I didn't, like I said no the first time. Um, maybe an hour or so later she asked again and I finally kind of gave into that, because you know I was thinking like, well, if she, if it, is going to get it going, you know, I kind of want it to. But I was also really scared. I remember looking at my husband and just thinking like I'm scared. I said to him I'm really scared and he said you this, you know he was the sweetest thing and so I had my waters broken and it did definitely get going from there. I think it only took about 40 minutes after that that I gave birth to him.

Katie: 13:59

So they were gone out of the room and I remember the position that felt so good to me was leaning over the bed with my arms on the bed in like a standing up position, and that just just where my body wanted to be. It felt the best and I was having contraction and all of a sudden I feel like the pushing just coming. I just start pushing and it was so involuntary. It was like this incredible feeling, like, oh, like I'm not doing that, and and so I said to my husband I think I'm pushing, and now I wish I didn't say anything, but whatever. So he's like, okay, he goes and grabs somebody and of course they have to check me to make sure I'm 10 centimeters, even though my body's already pushing.

Katie: 14:43

And and so I remember asking to like, can I, can I have him like standing up? And they don't, that's not convenient for them. So she she said, no, not really, like you need to be in the bed. So of course I was trying to be a good girl and you know, not push any buttons and break the rules. So I was like, okay, well, at least I'm going to be on my hands and knees on the bed. I tried that. Super uncomfortable, but not like that. It hurt my knees, um. So I ended up going one step away from being on your back is being on your side, kind of. Unless your body takes you there. Then, like, listen to your body, but it my body did not take me there. It was not comfortable for me.

Katie: 15:24

When I got in that position, all sensations of pushing went away and it was me having to forcefully push and I think that led to a lot of tearing that I had and just the pain and discomfort overall Because I wasn't yeah and so I ended up pushing. I started pushing at 3. And at 3.24 in the morning he was born and it was weird because she was like rushing me. At one point I remember her like kind of rushing me and I didn't feel like I was taking that long, so I just was giving it my all, like really pushing and by the end of it I had like I can't remember what the name of it is, but when you have like little blood vessels broken all in your face and your neck and because I was just pushing so hard to like get him out, because like she was making it seem like I really needed to get him out. She also said, before he was even out, she said you know, we might not be done after this, like you might have to have stitches. And I literally said to her shut up, like why would you say that to me? What his head isn't even out and you're saying, well, we might not be done yet. You know, and that was just one of those things like. And after the fact she like apologized because she knew it was kind of like, but I think she was like tired and like didn't want to be there anymore and she was rushing it typical. So yeah, that left a bad taste in my mouth when she said that. So I pushed him out in 20 minutes.

Katie: 16:54

Is that Mayo Hospital, or did you go to Bangor? Bangor, yep, I went to Bangor because they were the bigger hospital and Mayo now doesn't have a great reputation. They used to I, I guess, in the past with birth, but now I wouldn't go anywhere. But so you know, thankfully too, with COVID and everything, um, they had like the mask policy, but they weren't like pushy about me wearing it, which was nice like I pretty much didn't have it on. I don't know how a woman in labor would like that.

Angela: 17:25

That was just cruel yeah, it really is like you need to breathe, you need to smell your baby. When you know you pull your baby up oh my gosh.

Katie: 17:34

Yes, all of that and so yeah, so I remember you know I didn't really like she put. She put him right on my chest when he came out and I was in so much pain and like I think I had a lot of adrenaline, like an adrenaline after, and I was kind of had the shakes and and my vagina just hurt so bad. I remember just feeling like oh my gosh, like I feel like I'm torn apart.

Angela: 18:01

What position did you end up birthing him in? I?

Katie: 18:04

was on my side. Yeah, I was. I mean, it was sort of almost on my back, but, like you know, one of those things where, like I knew, I'd heard stories like being on your side is better than your back, but so I was on my side and you know, like it wasn't great.

Katie: 18:19

I'm, you know, I'm purple pushing, which is something I had on my birth plan, but of course, like that all goes out the door, like when you're in the hospital and so that I really believe that's why I tore so much and you know, it's kind of like a haze after he was born, because the rush of just like their checklist, of like all right, we clean up underneath here, we do this, we do that, we need to get them in the recovery room, and they just go through their checklist and not even really like thinking about like this person it's just a patient. You know, they're just the patient. You're in here. We got to get somebody else in here next. You're a customer to them.

Katie: 18:57

So it was just like a weird, you know, rush of like you know, I got stitches, that that, and then the lactation comes in and they're like trying to get nursing established right away and like sometimes, sometimes baby isn't ready, and like my son was not ready, he was really sleepy, and so I just felt like kind of like oh, like I don't know what I'm doing and like this is all a lot. And then they rush you out into the recovery room and I actually like I have a lot of regret about this part. I they, you know offered do you want us to take him and give him his first bath while we you go get settled and like I said yes to that and like I'll never forgive myself for like letting them take my like fresh baby, you know, and give him a bath and wipe all of that beautiful vernix and all of that off when he's like and now we're old, so yeah, I let them take him and you know he came back in the room and he was fine and we only ended up being in the hospital for, like it was early in the morning, so we stayed through that day and that night and then left the next day or whatever, and the experience, like overall, wasn't horrible. I really am thankful that it went, you know, good, as good as it could have been in the hospital in my true belief. But yeah, overall, you know, yeah, I don't have like I don't, I wouldn't call it traumatic.

Katie: 20:23

I guess it was just like not what I would want to ever go through again and like's it was definitely it took away from what birth is supposed to be and how a woman is supposed to feel in her power and birth and like just the whole process brings her to become the mother that she's meant to be and you know it sets the stage for motherhood really. So it wasn't until he was about a year. That well, okay, I guess I should go back. Covid was a catalyst for me and my family to the life that we're living now in terms of sovereignty and showing us the all the rabbit you can go down. You know vaccines in general, medication, pharmaceuticals, which I kind of had an idea about, but vaccines were something I never questioned until I had a child and something in me, my my instinct as a mom, like kicked in and I was like this kind of seems weird. And then I decided to just start going ham on educating myself and like I even made like my own little booklet on it.

Katie: 21:38

And so, yeah, yeah, and you know, obviously I would never be like I'm so glad COVID happened, like because a lot of terrible things happen, but for me it was, and I think for a lot of people it totally opened our eyes to so much more corruption and like just the truth really, and and and the. It's given me the drive to like want to be sovereign and to be totally self-sufficient in all ways, shapes and forms. You know, taking care of my children, feeding them. You know keeping them healthy and treating them when they're sick, and obviously, to an extent, I couldn't help them if they broke their arm or something. But yeah, you know the extremes, like emergency medicine is there and that's great, and so for a reason, there are some cases I think that people need it, but for my family, yeah, we're trying to stay as far away from it as we can.

Katie: 22:29

So that was the catalyst for us. And then, you know, I continued to like listen to just random podcasts while I was working because I cleaned, well, so, yeah, so we lost our jobs a year, you know, and my son was about a year yeah, he was a year. The vaccine mandate took place in Maine and we were not going to comply with that, so we decided to leave our jobs and so I started cleaning for a living and I listened to lots of months of podcasts and, oh sorry, yeah, I guess it was a year after that. So, a year in into cleaning, we weren't going to start having another baby, we wanted to have them kind of spaced out and I didn't get my cycle back until I was done nursing, which I stopped about 17 months. My son was the year when I discovered free birth.

Katie: 23:21

I heard it on a podcast that had nothing to do with birth, it was just like a health podcast, and they had a guest on that free birth, her baby and I was like, oh my gosh. And they had a guest on that rebirth, her baby and I was like, oh my gosh, like, and she was she's like this really smart, really health oriented, like, not that you have to be smart. But like, I just was like, wow, that's really interesting and I had never heard of it. I don't know how you, you don't, because that's just like was birthed for the longest time, but um, but I thought like whoa, like that seems kind of crazy at first, but I was like, all right, well, I'm intrigued, I want to like hear more stories. So I was like what other podcasts are there about free birth? Like that's the medicine is hearing what it could be Right, like, because women should share their stories and and and feel hurt in their trauma as well. But the, the stories of like triumph and, you know, bravery and just beauty and simplicity are also very much needed. That's what brought me to where I am.

Katie: 24:21

So I found the Free Birth Society podcast. Of course, that's like the probably the number one free birth podcast, and I just like, bam wow, world was changed. I just devoured the stories. I devoured every episode every day, multiple times, multiple episodes a day. I couldn't get enough.

Katie: 24:41

And then, of course, I re-listened when I was done, you know, cause of course, I was not having a baby anytime soon. This was January of last year, so, and I'm still nursing my son, so I haven't got my cycle back. So I decided, you know, my husband and I started, you know, talking about, you know, when we were to conceive again, how would we go about it? And and I still wasn't fully convinced that I was going to rebirth, yet I was like, definitely gonna be at home, probably maybe somebody will be there. I don't know and I don't know like what moment it was that I was finally like no, like we're going to just do this, but that's ultimately what we decided and my husband is Before you got pregnant, that you had basically kind of went through this like mindset shift.

Angela: 25:28

Really, yes, yeah for sure.

Katie: 25:31

Yeah, so probably like, yeah, like in that summer and I we conceived in August.

Katie: 25:36

So, like you know, shortly before then my husband is just, you know, a good teammate. He's the best teammate. He's just like all for it. He's like tell me, you know, educate me in ways that you can. You know, I had him listen to some of the episodes that I thought would be helpful for him, and just super interesting ones, even some of the twin stories, just as a whatever. And he actually has twins in his family, and so I was like we could conceive twins. This is what we're doing. But we didn't. So he was all on board, which is helpful.

Katie: 26:12

I didn't really have to do too much convincing and and and same thing with, like, the vaccines and stuff. He was just like we're, we're. We came from medical background, so it's kind of one of those things. It's like, you know, this might be hard to convince, but he just trusts me to take care of our family and um in the best way that I can, and he knows that, like, everything that I do is for our best interests. So we and we were at the point where we're like the medical system sucks, like they're not there for us. They're there to make money. They're there and not that everybody who's in it is bad, like that's definitely not what we think at all. But as a whole, that's just the way it's set up. It's not broken at all. That's just how it's. That's how it was created was to especially sever that mother-baby bond right from the start, before the baby's even born. I mean just going to prenatals and everything. So we conceived in August.

Katie: 27:10

I found out like two weeks later and it was so weird because I had I had had one period and then, no, I had two periods, so I had three ovulation. On the third ovulation, we conceived and I was like I felt like I knew within like a day or two Cause I I explained to him like I felt like I wasn't like alone anymore, which is just like the most beautiful, surreal feeling. Like I was like I just don't feel like I'm alone. But I didn't want to overthink it, cause I'm like I don't want to be wrong, you know. But yeah, so I hadn't even missed my period yet. My period was coming in like five, six, seven days even, and so I was like, even if I take this test, I don't know if it's going to be right. But I had been feeling like small symptoms, like frequent urination, like super early, and like a little bit of like food aversion.

Katie: 28:04

And when I took the test and it was, there was a really, and this time I did like think like do I want to not take the test? You know, some women do that and they just go about it, and but I really I love the test, I really want to see that like positive sign and I don't know, just the reassurance, um, maybe next time. But so it was a really, really faint line and I was like all right, that could be like an EVAP line. It's really so light, like you know. So I decided to go get the tests that say like positive or negative, because those are more, like you know, definite. I did and I got home, I took it, I didn't think anything of it and my husband was home and my mom was actually at my house watching my son while I worked, and so I come back to check it and it says positive and I'm like I did not expect it, like I kind of like I knew it but I didn't expect it at the same time. So I had to like play it cool because, like, my mom was here and I didn't want to like tell her quite yet, but my husband I couldn't tell my husband either until we got some alone time. So I was just, like you know, dying inside to tell him and we were really excited and like it was just like the first time. You, you know it's just there's a lot of joy and excitement that comes with it and like a little bit of like fear too, but more, just like you know, like this is another chapter.

Katie: 29:20

First, 10 or so weeks, 10, 12 weeks, and it was hard because you know cleaning houses like is not a very easy job physically and then also, you know, some things can smell. So it's like it was. It was hard and but I swear, I swear by the raw carrot salad is what helped my nausea go away and it could have been time to like you know, this was that like 10, 11 weeks when it stopped. But I started incorporating the raw carrot salad in my every day, which was hard at first because it wasn't like very appetizing to me, but I forced it and I swear that helped me so much and I didn't feel nauseous again after that.

Katie: 30:14

So the rest of my pregnancy we had a lot of family things going on. I'm not going to get too much into the details, but my sister and her four children moved in with us and we don't have a very big home, so it's eight people in this average size home with a lot of tumultuous things going on. Like the reason that they moved in it was just a lot. There's still things that we're dealing with as a family. So I imagined my wild pregnancy being super relaxing and easeful and one where I could really just tune into my body and take lots of baths and meditate and do yoga when I felt like it or whatever, and be just really calm, like a really calm nervous system, because that was important to me, to have like a super, super good energy surrounding me during my pregnancy especially, and unfortunately it wasn't exactly the way I had wanted. I wouldn't change anything because you know when your family needs you, you do what you can, you know. But so they moved in with us in November and then come March you know I was what I had calculated was my due date with him was May, the middle of May, ish Come March. It was kind of like okay, like we've got to find another living situation because you know I'm having a baby here. There's a lot of drama with all of this and it's like not good. There's a lot of drama with all of this and it's like not good, it's pretty toxic and I really need like positive energy. So they moved out.

Katie: 31:59

Um, we had about two months, you know, in the house, just us, and it was kind of hard to like get get back on track.

Katie: 32:05

I had to like reset my whole house like clean and like it was. It was a lot um, and you know that nesting feeling that you get like. So I was super like, oh my gosh, there's so much that needs to be done and with my son, like he was used to his cousins all being here, and then they kind of were gone and and you know, it was good in ways and hard in others. But but yeah, you know, so other than you know, there's a lot going on and like I couldn't have, I didn't have the best energy that I wanted. I need the most of it. I just tried to tune into my baby whenever I was, you know, cleaning throughout the day and like driving, and I got a fetus scope and my husband I would listen sometimes and we couldn't really hear until probably like 26 weeks or so, I think maybe even later. But it was kind of fun just to like play with that.

Angela: 32:57

And.

Katie: 32:58

I mean, like he moved so much like I he was, I knew he was okay and that was part of it was just the full trust and like knowing, you know, and I never really had any doubts like creeping in, you know it's. It's easy to confuse other people's fears for your own, and it takes practice, I think, to differentiate. You know what? Is this mine, or am I holding on to somebody else's fear? And, of course, with a wild pregnancy, everybody around you is like freaking out. It was a little bit hard on our family dynamics as far as parents and stuff. Our parents my husband's family comes from a very medical background. Literally all of them are nurses or CRNAs, and they're very much like believers in that system. So that was the one that I was the most nervous about, but we kind of avoided conversations about it until the end and we were really busy. We had a lot going on anyway, so it kind of worked out.

Katie: 34:07

I believe that women's birthing plans are nobody's business except for theirs and their partners, and that's it, and nobody's entitled to knowing anything. If you want to share, then that's up to you. That's obviously a hard concept for people to accept, though, and everything went okay. We did have a tough conversation with them about things which we wanted to. We wanted to be like look, this is what's going to happen and this is the way it is, but and it was a little bit tough, but it was also like really good for my husband and I because it was kind of like a breakthrough for him in some ways, with like speaking up to and sticking to what he believes in and speaking his truth, and for me as well. So and you know, I didn't even mention this, I forget it with all the other things I enrolled in the radical birthkeeping school and, yeah, in January or February it started.

Katie: 35:03

No, January started so I was full into that. So, like we were so busy, I was super excited about the program and I was ready to just learn all about it and because I felt like in another life I was like a midwife or something and I've just always been super, super interested and intrigued in wanting to support women and like work with women in my life. So I'm in the radical birthkeeping school. I'm learning so much about everything. I'm trying to integrate the tools that I'm learning to, to shift my mindsets and to make myself just like the best version of me, basically to like break through walls and to oh my gosh, there's so much. Emily was just she. The tools she taught have been life-changing and I'm still integrating them, to be honest.

Katie: 35:59

So those were really helpful in having some of those tough conversations with people and just trying to, like you know, create boundaries, because that was super important for this. Boundaries are important all the time for everybody, but they are so hard and I feel like, as women especially, we've always been like taught to like be nice and be the good girl and, like you know, tell everybody everything and all of that. So that's been something for me that has been one of the biggest. One of the biggest things I've learned about myself is like I am a people pleaser. Number one, number two I find it super hard to stand up for myself and just speak how I feel. So the school was really beneficial for me in that way and it's continuing to be so. Yeah.

Angela: 36:46

How long did it take you to get through that course? Were you finished with the course by the time you went into labor? So that's like the ultimate birth prep.

Katie: 36:55

I know literally like so, instead of the complete guide, I just did like that times 10. The course was amazing, being surrounded with other women who just are like-minded and so many different perspectives and like just the questions people have and the perspectives are incredible and it just, you know, it opens up your mind to a lot more. And there were, like so many other women, who were pregnant during the course and that was cool. My accountability partner was also pregnant. She was like two months ahead of me, so that was fun, like we connected a lot, and it was her first baby and so I thought that was awesome for her first baby. She's just dying right in.

Katie: 37:34

We were, you know, wild pregnancy, free birth, and so we that started in January. It was it was a 12 week course, I think the beginning of February, actually February, march, april, yeah yeah. So it ended in the middle of April, so I had about a month left. It was perfect timing to kind of be able to slow down. We had three classes a week which you could attend live or watch the replays. I was able to attend a good amount live, which I'm thankful for, because it was nice to be able to be in class and be a participant in it. So come April, I knew I'd wanted to take off at least like two weeks before I was potentially going to give birth of cleaning, because, you know, I wanted to give my body a rest and just really have time with my son, just one-on-one. And then, before the new baby came, that was really important to me and thankfully I did get a good one one. I think it was one and a half weeks or so of really just me and him. You know me being home, not having to clean, not having to worry about making money. And spring was here and I love spring because it's just like so, it feels so cleansing and like it's fresh and, like you know, we're starting over, I it's summer's coming next, all of the leaves and the blossoms start to come in and I was, you know, blossoming this baby. So it was like really um, symbolic for me in this pregnancy that I was going to birth him in the springtime too. So, yeah, I those. Those that week and a half that I had with just my son was so, so nice. I decided to not go on social media, I just took a detox from that so I would just be able to focus on us and it was so beautiful. I'm so glad we had it. We just played outside and just laughed and played and it was really nice.

Katie: 39:29

And throughout the pregnancy I would notice like I wouldn't have called them like contractions or like prodromal labor signs or whatever you know or no. They call them Braxton Hicks that's a dumb name but practice practices. You know your uterus is practicing, but I thought it was just my baby like shifting inside of me, like so I would. It would be when I was like you know, work, worked up like or working hard. So it makes sense that they were my uterus contracting, but I didn't think anything of it, that that was happening probably from like 30 weeks on, but like I didn't have, there were no signs of anything. I felt really good in my body. I didn't think anything was wrong. I really thought I was having a girl. That is one thing that I was wrong about. So, yeah, so come the week that he came, that Friday he came on Sunday. So that Friday I had a girlfriend over and we had a really nice visit and later that night I realized that throughout the day I was doing this swaying motion with my hips the whole day Just like this, really relaxing, swaying. And I remember hearing on one of the episodes on the Free Birth Society that this woman was doing the same thing. She was like I didn't realize it, but I was in labor land that whole day before. I was just swaying my hips and I put two and two together and I was like, hmm, okay, that's interesting, I'm going to take note of that Like I didn't have, you know, contractions or anything, but I was just swaying.

Katie: 41:01

And then, um, the next day was Saturday and my birthday was Thursday. So we celebrated my birthday and that, um, and then that weekend was mother's day. So, for you know, a birthday, mother's day celebration we were taking a family trip to a farm, a local farm, to go get compost for our garden, and that was our, that was my husband's present to me, which I loved because I wanted our garden to be really put together and ready to go, because I wasn't going to be able to work on it a whole lot for a while because I knew my baby was going to come. So we, um, on Saturday, we drove to the farm um to pick up the compost, and my son and I visited the cows and the pigs. And I remember on the drive they're feeling really trippy, like in that trippy birth zone, and I didn't feel that with my first son.

Katie: 41:51

So it was really cool to experience this and just like know that, like, oh, the time is near, and not like overthink anything, just be in it and feel it and experience it all. And I was looking up on the drive into the leaves and they looked so beautiful, the sun was shining, it was a beautiful day and it was just green and I was just like whoa, like I feel tripped out. And then I got this emotional rush where I just started crying. My husband was like what is going on? And I was like I think it's happening soon and I couldn't even explain it. It just was the rush. You know, no women can explain it. It's just like this rush. I felt like happy, sad, anxious, tired, depressed, excited, like all of them, and and I was like I just can't explain it, I just feel emotional. And he's like, okay, you know whatever. Okay, and I took that for what it was.

Katie: 42:47

And then we get home, we start doing stuff in the garden. My son and I were just picking weeds out of the garden. It was so nice, we're just laying in the dirt, getting our grounding in. And then we go to the grocery store that night and I really start to notice I'm feeling the sensations more regularly Like okay, this is happening, not just like here and there, like it's kind of having, like you know, multiple times an hour kind of thing, but nothing like intense, just just tightenings, really late tightenings. So we get home and then we're having dinner and and I decide like to tell my husband this kind of reminds me of with Theo, where, like I was like oh, this could be it, but I don't know. And Ryan's like okay, well, this is it. That's really like this is how it was the first time, this is definitely it. And so, you know, same thing. I was like we're just going to go with it. You know, whatever we went about our night.

Katie: 43:38

I took a bath that night. I really wanted to be able to relax in the bath, and so my husband let my son down and and then, when I was ready to go down to lay down for bed, it was like probably 1030. I put on this new nightgown I was really excited about this cotton nightgown and I decided like I think I should put a Chuck's pad down on the bed just in case, like my water breaks. I don't know, I'd never had that thought before. So I laid down for bed and I wasn't really like sleeping out because I was feeling like the tightenings, but like it wasn't necessarily keeping me up, it was just kind of like keeping me in, like an in-between zone of sleep. And I, all of a sudden, I like cleared my throat just like a little and I felt a little like gush of warm water between my legs and I was like, oh, oh, my gosh, that was my water. It was just this really light, beautiful, like pop, not even you couldn't hear. It was just like a little pop. And I'm like, well, I'm glad I put the chucks and so I get up. It's like 11, 30 and my husband's still up because he's prepping, for he was supposed to work the next day doing football stuff. So I was like, okay, my water just broke. And he was like, all right, I'm telling the guys it's off tomorrow, like I'm not going, obviously you're probably gonna have a baby.

Katie: 44:58

And so my initial like the feelings were a little bit of grief, because my whole pregnancy I had been manifesting, you know what I would say, my, my vision, the vision of my dream birth, and it was and I thought about this almost every day. Just, you know a vision. I would sit down and I would picture how my labor would be and how I wanted it to look. And it was how I wanted it to look was a labor during the day, like afternoon, after I had a night's rest, a good night's rest. I would have pancakes that morning and a really good breakfast. And it would be during the day, in the sun, sunny day, and I would probably be in the bath. But you know, it was like kind of like whatever I feel like.

Katie: 45:46

So I was kind of like sad that this was all happening at like 1130. I was like man, like I haven't slept, like I'm going to be so tired. And then I did also fear, feel just a teeny bit of fear, and the fear was not me worrying about is something going to go wrong? Like I was not scared about something bad happening. I was more fearful of like this is it like that's about to go down? I'm about to be in? Probably some pain like this is gonna hurt a little bit at least, and so the fear was more like the anticipation of what I was going to feel, I guess, so like I had butterflies in my stomach, and I decided to just stay up for a little bit to see if it would pick up. Because you know, a lot of times second labors can be like super fast and especially after your water break, sometimes it's like really fast from there. So I stayed up for a little bit and like nothing picked up, it kind of like slowed down if anything. So I was like, okay, well, I'm gonna go back to bed.

Katie: 46:47

So midnight, 12 30, I decided to go, lay back down and cuddle my son a little extra in bed. I had the trippiest sleep ever. I was in between worlds at that point where I was just like. I was just so trippy, that's all I can say to explain it. I would check my phone here and there and it would be like every hour or two, and like the sensations were keeping me, you know, they were pulling me out of my sleep a little bit, and and I was just dreaming these crazy dreams.

Katie: 47:16

And so by like seven in the morning I decided like, all right, I'm gonna get up and get get breakfast going, get myself going, it's mother's day. And so my husband, he had to leave. He had to go get something. I don't remember what it was, but I I was kind of like, oh, you're going to leave right now. Like, well, I'm in labor. But he had it was something he had to get. I can't remember what it was. So I was like, all right, well, you need to take our toddler. So, like you know, if I have this baby, like I'm not trying to deal with a toddler too, to deal with a toddler too, so I'm like, take him, I'm just going to be here, do my thing, like hopefully you're here, you get back before he's born. But you know, we'll see.

Katie: 48:03

So I make myself breakfast, I make pancakes. I was very adamant on making those pancakes, so I made blueberry pancakes, I made bacon, and by this point the sensations were enough to like where I was leaning over things and like really breathing, but like nothing, nothing crazy hard, you know, just just taking me out of my normal zone. I ate my breakfast and and then I cleared my bowels. And I hadn't done that with the first one, but like every, I swear, just everything that happened in this labor was just so like by the book and like the book whatever, nature, nature's design, nature's beautiful design. And so I cleared cleared my bowels and like I kind of like stayed on the toilet a little bit to see if the contractions were like like would would intensify at all, cause I've heard a lot of stories with that and nothing happened.

Katie: 48:55

And I kind of was like you know, it wasn't like I didn't want to just sit on the toilet, so so I decided to take another bath and I listened to Yolanda's birth affirmations. Yolanda was one of my teachers. She has a free birth affirmations. Um, I think the link's probably on her website, but that was. I listened to that the night before and I listened to that the morning of, and that was beautiful, just to sit in the warm bath and listen to that. And I wasn't like time in my contractions, but I like calculated that her, her affirmations were about 20 minutes and I had three contractions. So I was like, okay, you know, I just like had that in my head but I wasn't thinking anything of it. I was just like going about labor as normal, got out of the bath and then my husband and son came home and they were so excited when they came in and he says you won't, you won't believe it, we saw a moose on our drive home and, like you know, living in Maine, people probably think like, oh, we see moose all the time, but I've seen one moose my whole life living in Maine and I'm like my son's two and a half and he's already seen his first moose and I'm like this is a sign about this labor and birth, like you know, like I was like what does this mean, like for me in this baby, and you know, I looked it up later and moose are like signs of abundance and some other things, I don't know. It was beautiful though and I thought that was just like a cool extra part of the story. So we're home and I can now.

Katie: 50:25

You know, I went into my room and just labored, kind of alone, was in my zone. It was just so quiet and peaceful. I had the curtains curtains open. I didn't have a desire to like be in the dark at that point. I just laid on my bed and, like I would lay down and rest and then when I felt, when I felt a sensation coming, I would just get on my hands and knees and rock and remember the affirmations and just like try to feel into every sensation more and like somehow turn any sensation of pain into pleasure or or not pleasure, but like just just a, just a feeling instead of a painful feeling. And they, they weren't super intense. Still, this was a.

Katie: 51:11

So I started we bring about 1030 in my room by 1130. I he, I started feeling like the baby was coming down my birth canal, like he was in there, locked and loaded, and I knew it and I could feel it. And so I yelled to my husband like Okay, get the bath going, because I'm ready, I want to get in there. And so he starts it. And yeah, like I, it's so crazy. I just I was just so in my body and like not overthinking anything, not like not worrying and and just listening and whatever my body was telling me. I was just doing. And I and I knew he was in my birth canal, like you just know it. And so I get into the bath before it's even like an inch filled. I'm like I get to get in there.

Katie: 52:02

And at this point it did pick up, like for me, birth gets super intense when the baby is like right there and ready to come. But up till then, for both babies it has been just super manageable, which I feel super grateful for, and maybe it's because of the mindset I've had, but you know, who knows, it doesn't really matter either way. But so, yeah, it started getting intense and I could not turn the sensations in into pleasure. At that point. I kind of was like more in the mindset of, like I got to get the baby out, like this is painful, and I really wanted to be more patient with like the pushing and everything. I wanted to like stretch and like not, not, not go so fast that like he's just shooting out because it does help with tearing. It can't help, but I it wasn't something I was able to do in those moments. So so I'm in the bathtub and I know I'm in transition.

Katie: 52:55

At this point I'm feeling like nauseous and and just in that, in that space, and my husband just right there with me and my son's like you know, we put on like a TV show for him so he could kind of be distracted and but he keeps coming in like to check. Like he's like, is baby here, baby, baby? Like no, and at this point I was actually getting vocal baby, baby, no. And at this point I was actually getting vocal. So I was not before, but at this point I am roaring kind of yelling, and he wasn't scared, but he was just like curious, like like what's going on? Like mom's screaming and you know, my husband's just assuring him like mom's okay, like baby's going to be here soon. And he was fine and he was great. And there was a point where I was like, wow, like nobody's saving me, this is just me. I got to like the baby's coming, like there's nothing I can do, you know, and it was almost just like yeah, I just got to have the baby, he's just got to birth him and um, so I'm like checking every once in a while to like feel and his. You know, his transition down was like pretty fast. I mean, it was decently fast. So this was at 1130,.

Katie: 54:04

I got in the bathtub and he came out right after 12. So it wasn't too long of being in there. I tried to slowly kind of push him and his head. When head did come out, I kind of like felt down and for some reason I just thought like what if that's not a head, like I? I knew it was, but I was kind of like well, what if it's not? Because it just feels squishy. You know, like it's just all kind of feels squishy. And so I asked my husband is that his head? And he goes, he checks and looks and he's like, yes, that's his head, of course, that's his head there, of course that's his head, there's his neck right there. And so I'm just like trying to breathe through it and I was trying to kind of talk to him through this too. I was saying, you know, like you've got this baby, you've got this baby and we've got this, you can do it.

Katie: 54:47

And so his head comes out and there's a little bit of a pause, and then I'm roaring him out like very loud, screaming at this point, and then the rest of him just kind of comes out and my husband grabs him up from the water and gives them right up to me in my arms and all of the pain, all of the, the intensity, just like immediately goes away and like you don't even like remember it, almost right after it's like whoa. And then I'm just holding my baby and I'm like in disbelief and I'm kind of like like laughing not laughing, but like excited, like a oh my gosh, like you know, and he didn't have his cord wrapped around his neck or anything, which is super common, but he didn't. It was, it wasn't, it was. It wasn't there, it was just untangled and I was just looking at him holding him and my, my son, had watched this part. When he did finally come out, he was right there. So he was like baby, baby and he immediately wanted to hold him. He was like I want to hold the baby, I want to hold the baby.

Katie: 55:50

It was so cute when I watched the video cause we got it all in video, which is I'm so happy about, but I kind of tuned everybody else out, like my husband. There were a few questions he was asking, like the next like 10 minutes, that I totally didn't even know he was asking. Until I watched the video I was like, oh, I didn't even know you were talking to me, cause you're just like looking at your baby and I'm looking at him and he hadn't cried yet. He probably cried like a minute or a minute later, but I looked to see what gender he was before he even cried. I was like so excited to look and I was like it's another boy and I look at him and I look at Theo and he said it's another boy and I think I said you have a brother and he was just saying baby, baby, and I'm just kind of rubbing his back, I'm just cradling him, rubbing his back, and he cries. Of course I never felt scared or like worried, like he wasn't okay, I just was letting him come to and he did, and I felt like really uncomfortable in the water.

Katie: 56:51

Once he did start crying, we got, like you know, it was probably 10 minutes in. I was like I want to get out of here. It's kind of cold, but it was hard to get out of the tub, like I probably should have just stayed in there. To be honest, it probably would have made it a little bit easier. Standing up definitely like hurt my pelvis right after all of that and just like holding the baby trying to get out.

Katie: 57:12

And, like your, my placenta was still in and so I get into bed and my husband like laid all the you know blankets and everything and man, those after pain with him were intense, like with my first sign. They gave me pitocin right after birth. I didn't have any bleeding complications. They just did that automatically, which you, you don't have to do, obviously. So I feel like that was the reason why I didn't have them as bad with him and it was my first baby too, but with with him.

Katie: 57:41

Oh my gosh, they were intense and I really wanted to get the placenta out, cause I felt like that would help a little bit. I was super uncomfortable, I was just trying to like breathe through them. They were almost worse. They were probably worse than most of my labor contractions, to be honest. So probably 15 to 20 minutes later I decided to just give it a little bit of traction while I was having some of the contractions, but I just I tugged on the cord just a little bit and it slipped right out with ease.

Katie: 58:10

I mean, I didn't notice any excess bleeding, I didn't think twice about it, I wasn't scared about it. You know, if someone was paying attention to it, they could overthink it and be like, oh my gosh, this is bad. But when I was just like paying attention to how I felt, and I felt fine, other than the pain of the contractions, I didn't feel nauseous, I didn't feel lightheaded, nothing. I just wasn't overthinking it, it was just letting it be what it was going to be, and that's what made it pretty much like textbook, textbook physiological, like every hormone was there when it needed to be. The cascade was perfectly orchestrated, the way that we were designed and and that's what led to just like no complications and like easefulness of it. So, yeah, I just laid in bed the rest of the day. He was born at noon, so we just kind of laid in bed and it was pretty awful.

Katie: 59:05

I've got like the worst migraine ever, which that would that might scare somebody to be like oh, why do you have a migraine? It wasn't a migraine, I would say, like a headache, I guess, so it kind of. It would come on when I would have like the contractions with my uterus and it like was throbbing. I was never worried about it but it just kind of sucked, it like took away from like baby.

Katie: 59:26

You know, my son was kind of like bubbly too at his mouth, like he had like spit, a lot of spit and like bubbles, and like a part of me was like a little bit like not worried about him, but like he was breathing and everything. But like I was like I just want to make sure he's okay and like I sort of sucked in his mouth a little bit. I didn't feel that innate drive to do that. It was more like oh, I've seen people do this, Like let me try it, but there was nothing that came up. He just, you know, he just was a little bubbly and honestly, now he still is a, he drools a lot. He's got a lip and a tongue tie too, so like he can't control the spit in his mouth as well. So I think that's just like you know, kind of like the way it was.

Katie: 1:00:09

But I had, like the support from the women, some of the women in my class. We, we created like a telegram group so we talked to each other on there and so everybody who's had their free birth sense like we always like we're like babies here, and it's been really beautiful to like just see all of the women who have been having their free birth babies and and so I reached out to them and kind of like told them and they were all like you know, everything's fine, blah, blah, blah, just giving me support as women should. But yeah, so you know, I kind of hate the way the rest of my postpartum went. My birth was so beautiful and perfect and just simple, like it was the best thing I could ever have wanted it to be. And then postpartum, kind of just like took all of that and like threw it in the trash.

Katie: 1:01:01

Um, we my husband was a little bit overwhelmed with just the amount of tasks that he felt like he was left to do. You know he was there to help take care of me and do everything for me and also for our toddler, and, like you know, there was a there was a little bit of a mess. It wasn't like terrible, but just like somebody had given birth. We had so much laundry to do from all the towels and our dishes were like piled high because they were already like that before, and so he felt super overwhelmed with the amount that he felt like he had to do, which I don't blame him for, we've had some discussions about it since and there was a little bit of resentfulness, sort of. But at the same time he didn't feel supported too, and that's important because if he's my only support person, he needs to have something there to help him too. So we ended up calling in help the next day, which I didn't want anybody to be in my space for at least a couple days, and so a lot of people's energy came in and it just put me in a bad place, and so next time I would definitely be hiring somebody who either I don't know at all or somebody who's like a close friend that I really feel like I can trust to just come and clean and do some of those tasks. That would definitely be something I would want to do in the future.

Katie: 1:02:32

Because, yeah, I just know it kind of took away from everything and set me up for like, not a great rest rest of the next few weeks and like we were still sleeping with my toddler, we didn't really have a plan when the baby came what we were going to do. We were like, oh, we'll just all sleep as a family. You know a lot of people do that, um, but my toddler is a really light sleeper and, of course, having a new baby like throws everything off, like he's, you know, trying to get used to that and new routines and everything. And so they ended up going into another room, him and my husband and me and the baby slept in the room by ourselves. But everything's worked itself out and you know we're just kind of getting into the swing of things as a family and my toddler loves his little brother. He didn't have a name for a week Because I was so convinced I was having a girl that we had the girl name ready, but we did not have any boy names.

Katie: 1:03:30

We had some tentative ones we liked, but we decided on Axel. It was between that and Felix, and we really loved that name too, which actually means abundance, and I thought that it was cool with the moose thing that happened. But there was kind of like a weird somebody like made a comment about like you shouldn't name your son that, and so it kind of like put a bad taste in our mouth about it and it was a family member. So we were like oh, oh, why would you say that? Like what would you tell us? You know what I mean? That was just another like negative part of everything.

Katie: 1:04:01

Like so, and you know, that's a part of my story that I'm wondering, like you know, how did I maybe manifest this? How, how am? Am I taking part in this, this negativity, and like, am I, am I capping myself at my happiness only being so high because I've been used to something for so long? And I'm not allowed to feel, you know, any more happy than that and I'm not allowed to feel like everything's going good for once, and and it's something that I'm working through now and will continue to but I just like want to encourage women to like definitely set yourself up postpartum and just believe in yourself and your bodies. And like, don't overthink things and even if you do, it's okay.

Katie: 1:04:52

Okay, like we are perfectly designed the the the risk of something bad happening in a physiological birth is so small it is not zero, because that's life and with life comes death but it is so much smaller when we birth. The way we were designed. But also, you know, if you feel more comfortable in a hospital, you should probably birth in a hospital, because if you're at home and you're not feeling safe, it's not going to go. Well, probably because you're you're. You know in your head you're thinking I'm not safe here, so get right with yourself. Listen to lots of birth stories. That was the medicine that I needed. Honestly, it brought me to where I am. And yeah, and I just want other women to feel empowered and encouraged that they can do it. Whether you've had a c-section or no babies at all, or you're having twins, or you have a breech baby, all of those are variations of normal. So yeah, you can do it.

Angela: 1:05:56

Oh my gosh, I love all of that. It's really important to really just trust in your body.

Katie: 1:06:01

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Angela: 1:06:03

So now, if you were to, give advice to expecting parents, or especially parents that might be shifting out of that medicalized mindset. What would you say to them?

Katie: 1:06:15

Yeah, yeah, I think stories, really stories all the time. Listen to the stories. There's so many different perspectives from all of the stories of women from all backgrounds, all walks of life. Listen to as many stories as you can and just try to like come back to that trust in your body and in yourself and and think about all the women who have done this before you and find like my community, to like you know, if you could find in in person, that's. That's the best we need to connect. As women, we truly have always had connection with each other. So if you can find that, that's great. But if you can't, you know, look online and try to like make friends with people who see things the same way. Um, go to women's circles that align with you. Of course, I mean they don't have to be exactly what we believe in, but I just started hosting women's circles and I'm really excited about that, to be offering that kind of community. I'm really trying to cultivate that in this area because we don't have anything like that.

Katie: 1:07:23

So, yeah, finding that community and reaching out to people that have similar situations, with the medical background stuff, yeah, it is hard to disconnect from that, but if you're starting, if you're on the brink of that, you're probably one. Once you start, you don't go back. That's all I'm going to say. Like you don't just learn the things that you've learned, and like you're like, well, I'm just going to choose to like, go back to like all of that corruptness and like the stuff that just doesn't really make sense. You don't go back, you just you stay where you're going and you keep going, you keep learning more and and you feel more in control of like you can set the stage for your life and your family's life, and and you have to take personal responsibility really at the end of the day, you're the only one that can, can choose what you're going to choose for yourself, like, and you can't necessarily put that blame on other people.

Katie: 1:08:18

There are some instances, I guess, but take responsibility and be proud of that and be excited that you you get to do that and you get to say no. Just say no to whoever you want. It feels good. It takes some practice, but I would recommend going on a no diet, look up a no diet and practice that with a family member and you can, like, start to cultivate that practice of saying no and you'll be able to use that with other people in your life slowly but surely and it'll be easier to set those boundaries, and with family.

Katie: 1:08:53

It can be hard and if someone's giving you a hard time, like you just got to cut them out for a little while, if that's the way it is, especially if you're pregnant or trying to conceive and that energy is so important to keep safe and sacred, that just cut them out and don't feel bad. You know if you can and if you can't, I don't know. Find a way that you can, I guess, but stay strong and like Find a way that you can, I guess, but stay strong and I want to tell women that they can do this. They can do it however they want, and I would be happy to talk to anybody that wants to reach out to me on Instagram. I have Facebook I don't really use it, but Instagram is probably the best place but I would love to talk. I'd love to talk about birth.

Katie: 1:09:36

I am a radical birth keeper, but I'm not practicing serving women quite yet. I don't feel ready for that quite yet in my life, where we're at. But I'm really trying to get into education and like just trying to support women in other ways and maybe postpartum support first too. But yeah, so yeah, and I have there's tons of people on Instagram that are so inspirational and just like the more you are surrounded by that kind of stuff, the more confidence you gain. That just like it's just birth, like it's not a medical emergency, it's not a medical event, and we can take back that power and set our children up for the most untraumatic lives and you know, and for power for them. Like just think about how you would want your daughter to be when you guys have babies, you know. So yeah, yeah.

Angela: 1:10:31

Yeah, oh, my gosh, I love all of that. So what is your Instagram account so people can find you?

Katie: 1:10:38

Yeah, so I have a personal account which I would be open to that People adding me on that too, it's KT, loving life, and then my business page is instinctively underscore woman W O M B A N. So that's my, that's my business account. I haven account. I don't have a whole lot of content yet, but, yes, feel free to reach out to me on there. I'd love to chat, yeah.

Angela: 1:11:05

Yeah, because there's really not a lot of support up in the Dover Foxcroft area. There's almost nothing yeah.

Katie: 1:11:12

And in Maine in general, probably Southern Maine more. I know you've had Naya on and I connected with her once and I went to a woman's circle and she, um, she's probably been great for Maine and this area up in the Northern more Northern area.

Katie: 1:11:27

But there was one other woman from my class that lives in Maine too, so we'll see what we me and her can master together. But yes, I want to be support for women that feel like there's nothing around them, Cause the more we actually speak out, the more we realize like there's more of us than we think. So we just have to connect.

Angela: 1:11:48

So oh my gosh, I love that so much and it is so true and I love that even just through this podcast I've been able to connect and find resources that I'm also able to share through the podcast with all of the people in Maine. There is support out there. There are people even in these rural areas that can support you through positive, sovereign birth.

Katie: 1:12:09

Yeah, yes, thank you so much. I'm so glad to have this opportunity and it's nice to be able to speak to other women in Maine, so we don't hear a lot of our voices and any other platforms.

Angela: 1:12:21

Yeah Well, thank you so much, katie. It was really a true pleasure to hear your birth stories and I will link all of your information in the show notes for anyone that wants to click over.

Katie: 1:12:32

Okay, Thank you so much for having me Click over, okay.

Angela: 1:12:35

Thank you so much for having me, and that's the end of another episode of the my Main Birth Podcast. Thank you for joining me and listening. I hope that the stories shared here have been inspiring and informative to all of my listeners. If you're looking to capture your own birth story, I highly recommend considering my birth photography services. I'm a professional photographer and I'm very passionate about capturing the raw and emotional moments of the birthing process, and I designed a personalized and intimate photo album, creating a beautiful and lasting memory of one of the most special moments of your life. For more information, head over to mymainphotocom and schedule a call with me. Thanks again for tuning in and I look forward to bringing you more amazing birth stories. Don't forget to subscribe and leave me a review, and I'll see you back here again next week.